Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Elephant Jokes

We've got lots of funny Elephant jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants?
A. "Look, a herd of elephants!"

Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a parrot?
A. An animal that tells you everything it remembers!

Q. There were two elephants under one umbrella, why didn't they get wet?
A. It wasn't raining.

Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. The chicken couldn't be bothered!

Q. What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
A. Sir!

Q. What goes down but never goes up?
A. An elephant in an elevator.

Q. What kind of ant is so strong that it can knock down trees?
A. An elephant.

Q. What has big ears and shouts "HUT! HUT! HUT!"?
A. An elephant quarterback.

Q. Why do elephants have wrinkles?
A. Ever tried to iron an elephant?

Q. What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant?
A. Swimming trunks!

Q. Why doesn't the elephant use the computer?
A. Because it is afraid of the mouse!

Q. Why couldn't the elephant move?
A. Because he couldn't lift his trunk!

Q. What did the elephant say to her son when he was naughty?
A. "Tusk tusk!"

Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. Because the chicken retired!

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. Because they would look funny with a suitcase.

Q. How does a elephant get out of a tree?
A. He climbs on a leaf and waits till autumn!

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses?
A. Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.

Q. What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an elephant?
A. Great big holes all over Australia.

Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.

Q. How do you eat an elephant?
A. One bite at a time.

Jokes

Down in the south where coconuts grow, an elephant stepped on a mosquito's toe. The mosquito jumped up with tears in his eyes and said, "Excuse me but you're not my size."
 

A guy and his elephant are driving and get pulled over. The policeman says, "You need to take the elephant to the zoo." So the guy took his elephant to the zoo. The next day, the same policeman pulls over the same guy and elephant. The policeman says, "I told you to take the elephant to the zoo." The guy says, "I did yesterday, today we are going to a baseball game."
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Policeman: One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle. Zoo keeper: Nonsense, none of my elephants know how to ride a bicycle.
 

Peter: Mother, why is a snail stronger than an elephant? Mother: I don't know. Peter: Because a snail can carry its own home, but an elephant can only carry its own trunk.
 

An elephant asked an ant, "Please hide me." So the ant replied, "Hide behind me."
 


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