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Elephant Jokes

We've got lots of funny Elephant jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What did the elephant say to her son when he was naughty?
A. "Tusk tusk!"

Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.

Q. What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
A. Sir!

Q. Why did the elephant wear red tennis shoes?
A. To hide in the strawberry patch!

Q. What's big and grey with horns?
A. An elephant marching band!

Q. How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A. Grapes are purple.

Q. What do a car, tree and an elephant have in common?
A. They all have trunks!

Q. Why did the elephant paint his fingernails red?
A. So he could hide in a bowl of cherries.

Q. Why was the elephant afraid of the computer store?
A. Because they sold the world's best mice.

Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
A. Lost.

Q. There were two elephants under one umbrella, why didn't they get wet?
A. It wasn't raining.

Q. Why couldn't the two elephants go swimming together?
A. Because they only had one pair of trunks!

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. What's big, grey and has red spots?
A. An elephant with chicken pox!

Q. How do you eat an elephant?
A. One bite at a time.

Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.

Q. What time is it when an elephant sits in a chair?
A. Time to buy a new chair!

Q. Why do elephants have wrinkles?
A. Ever tried to iron an elephant?

Q. What has big ears and shouts "HUT! HUT! HUT!"?
A. An elephant quarterback.

Q. What do you get when you cross a dog, a goat and an elephant?
A. A dogophant.

Jokes

Down in the south where coconuts grow, an elephant stepped on a mosquito's toe. The mosquito jumped up with tears in his eyes and said, "Excuse me but you're not my size."
 

A guy and his elephant are driving and get pulled over. The policeman says, "You need to take the elephant to the zoo." So the guy took his elephant to the zoo.

The next day, the same policeman pulls over the same guy and elephant. The policeman says, "I told you to take the elephant to the zoo."
The guy says, "I did yesterday, today we are going to a baseball game."
 

An elephant asked an ant, "Please hide me." So the ant replied, "Hide behind me."
 

Policeman: One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle.
Zoo keeper: Nonsense, none of my elephants know how to ride a bicycle.
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Peter: Mother, why is a snail stronger than an elephant?
Mother: I don't know.
Peter: Because a snail can carry its own home, but an elephant can only carry its own trunk.
 


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