Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. What do miners put on their face at night?
A. Coal cream.
Q. What do dogs and trees have in common?
Q. What smells like red paint but is blue?
A. Blue paint.
Q. What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
A. Open TOAD sandals.
Q. What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says throw out that gum and a train says chew, chew!
Q. What do eagles do when they coach a sports team?
A. They wing it.
Q. What do cheerleaders drink?
A. Root beer.
Q. How do you communicate with a fish?
A. Drop it a line.
Q. What do you call a football player whose helmet is too tight?
A. Call him anthing you want, he can't hear you!
Q. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?
A. Joseph, Pharoah made a ruler out of him.
Q. What call for help, when written in capital letters, is the same forwards, backwards and upside down?
Q. Why does a seagull fly over the sea?
A. If he flew over a bay he'd be called a bagel!
Q. Why did the dalmation go to the eye doctor?
A. Because he kept seeing spots.
Q. Why was the doctor angry?
A. He lost his patients.
Q. I am the beginning of end and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation and I surround every place. What am I?
A. The letter E!
Q. Why didn't Noah do much fishing on the ark?
A. He only had two worms!
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. Because KFC was on the other side.
Q. What do you call a woodpecker with no beak?
A. A head banger.
Q. What do you get when you cross a magician with a camera?
A. Hocus Focus!
Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
Q. What language does a billboard speak?
A. Sign language.
Q. What animal is NOT allowed to play in games or contests?
A. Cheetahs (cheaters)
Q. Why did the mattress go the doctor?
A. It had spring fever.
Q. What two candies are the smartest?
A. Smarties and Nerds.
Q. What has a forest with no trees, lakes without water, roads with no cars and deserts with no sand?
A. A map!
Q. How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
A. A buccaneer (A buck an ear)
Q. How do you start a teddy bear race?
A. Ready, teddy, go!
Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
Q. Why did the rancher name his ranch "Peanut Butter"?
A. It was a great spread.
Q. What do you call a bunny with fleas?
A. Bugs Bunny.
Q. Why did the silly electrician jump over the clock?
A. So he could get some overtime!
Q. What do you call a cow who learns how to belly dance?
A. A milkshake!
Q. What would we do if we found bad plants spoiling our lawn?
A. We'd weed.
Q. What animal never tells the truth?
A. A lion.
Q. What did the calculator say to the other calculator?
A. "You can count on me!"
Q. What is the smartest city in America?
A. Alabama because it has four A's and one B!
Q. What is the radius of a pumpkin?
Q. Why do teachers give you homework?
A. Just to annoy you.
Q. What did the volcanoes name their daughter?
Q. What did the paper cowboy say to the pencil cowboy?
Q. Why did the banana factory shut down?
A. Because they chucked out all the bent ones!
Q. What can you throw but not catch?
A. A fit!
Q. What happens if Peter Pan punches you?
A. You Neverland!
Q. Why did the one handed man cross the road?
A. To get to the second hand shop!
Q. Why did the grandma sit in the rocking chair with her roller blades on?
A. Because she wanted to rock and roll.
Q. The person who makes it sells it, the person who buys it never uses it, the person who is in it doesn't know it, what is it?
A. A coffin.
Q. How do you make varnish disappear?
A. Take away the R!
Q. Where do horses go when they are sick?
Q. What did one coffin say to the other coffin?
A. "Is that you coughin'?"
Q. Have you heard the joke about the butter?
A. Better not tell you, it might spread!
Q. I have 7 children half of them are boys, what is the other half?
A. They were all boys.
Q. What street does a vampire live on?
A. A dead end!
Q. What kind of bagel can fly?
A. A plain bagel.
Q. What part of a fish weighs the most?
A. Its scales.
Q. How do you spell mousetrap with ONLY three letters?
Q. There are 5 fish and 2 drown. How many are left?
A. Fish don't drown.
Q. Where do famous dragons go after they retire?
A. The hall of flame!
Q. What gate can't you enter?
Q. Mary's mum had three children. One was called April, the second was May. What was the name of the last one?
Q. Why does a giraffe eat so little?
A. Because they can make a little go a long way.
Q. What is a crate's favorite sport?
Q. What type of queue do dolls like best?
A. A BBQ.
Q. Why did the snake get a detention?
A. Because he was HISSpering!
Q. There was a little moron and a big moron sitting on the edge of a bridge. The big moron fell off but the little one didn't, how come?
A. He was a little more on!
Q. Where do oak trees come from?
Q. What do you get with a kangoroo and a snake?
A. A jump rope.
Q. There are ten cats on a boat. One jumps off, how many are left?
A. None, they were all copy cats!
Q. What did Shakespeare say to the pencil?
A. "Write on!"
Q. What has the fur of a cat, the whiskers of a cat, ears of a car, a tail of a cat, but is not a cat?
A. A kitten.
Q. What insect is a coward?
A. A flea!
Q. What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A. Finding half a worm in your apple.
Q. What do you get if you cross some bubble bath and a famous detective?
A. Sherlock Foams.
Q. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A. Because he felt crummy.
Q. Why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant?
A. Because he had a big bill.
Q. Where will you find the biggest rope in the world?
A. In EuROPE!
Q. How do you wrap a cloud?
A. With a rainbow.
Q. What tools do you need for math?
Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A. Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?!
Q. What did the broken clock say?
A. "Will someone give me hand?"
Q. Why do Rappers like Christmas so much?
A. Because of all the wrapping!
Q. What always runs, never walks, often murmurs, never talks, has a bed but doesn't sleep, has a mouth but never eats?
A. A river!
Q. What is a 3 letter word that gets bigger when you add 3 letters?
Q. What did the flower say to the bike?
Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch-dog.
Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."
Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.
Q. How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
A. It gave her a ring!
Q. What's the difference between winter and a hurt football player?
A. One is cold out and the other one is out cold.
Q. What object is king of the classroom?
A. The ruler!
Q. Which wolf got lost in the woods?
A. The WHEREwolf.
Q. Why do mushrooms like to tell jokes?
A. Because they're a fungi!
Q. What do you call a cat that eats lemons?
A. A sourpuss.
Q. What did the 0 say to the 8?
A. "Nice belt."
Q. Who does Frankenstein invite to his party?
A. Anyone he can gobble up!
Q. Why did the star go to the bathroom?
A. It had to twinkle!
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
Q. What do you call a deer that makes money?
A. A buck!
Q. What is the capital of Greece?
Q. Why couldn't the skeleton laugh?
A. Because he lost his funny bone.
Q. How do you attach a duck to the wall?
A. With Duck tape!
Q. Why is the ocean always grumpy?
A. You'd be grumpy too if you had crabs on your bottom!
Q. What's black when you get it, red when you use it and white when you're finished?
Q. How did Jack Frost get to work?
A. By icicle!
Q. What runs but has no legs?
A. A nose!
Q. What money do dogs and cats have?
A. Kitty cash and doggy dollars.
Q. How do you get rid of a boomerang?
A. Throw it down a one way street!
Q. Which letter comes once in a minute, twice in a millennium but never in thousand years?
A. The letter M.
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
A. Bacon and legs!
Q. What fish can help you build a house?
A. A hammerhead shark.
Q. What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
A. Poultry in motion.
Q. How do you throw a tent?
A. You pitch it!
Q. Why did the dog stay out of the sun?
A. So he wouldn't be a hotdog.
Q. What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Q. What has four eyes but can't see?
Q. Why did the tomato blush?
A. Because it saw the salad dressing!
Q. What do you call a 100-year-old ant?
Q. I usually wear a yellow coat. I usually have a black tip and wherever I go I make marks. What am I?
A. A pencil.
Q. Have you heard the joke about the bed?
A. It hasn't been made yet!
Q. Why is history the sweetest lesson?
A. Because it is full of dates.
Q. What insect is an arithmetic insect?
A. A mosquito! They add to misery, subtract from pleasure, divide the attention and multiply quickly!
Q. How many sides does a circle have?
A. Two, inside and out.
Q. What is a cow's favourite drink?
A. MOO Juice.
Q. What is a snowman's favorite food?
A. Ice Krispy treats.
Q. What does the baby popcorn call his dad?
Q. How do you make a goldfish age?
A. Take away the g in goldfish.
Q. What did the magazine say to the pencil?
A. "You are looking very sharp today."
Q. What vegetable has eyes but can't see?
A. A potato.
Q. Tall in the morning, short at noon, gone at night but I'll be back soon. What am I?
A. A shadow!
Q. Why was the crab arrested?
A. For pinching!
Q. Why did the oak tree have to eat his ice cream in a dish?
A. The pine tree wouldn't give him a cone!
Q. Why did the bee get married?
A. Because she found her honey.
Q. What is a dog that sneezes?
Q. Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A. Because they are always a little short!
Q. What did the plow say to the tractor?
A. "Pull me a little closer, John Deere."
Q. Sam, Lula, Mike, and Kayla all live in a house. Mike and Kayla went out to the movies and when they got back Lula was on the floor dead in a pile of broken glass and water. Sam was on the couch sleeping and didn't know what happened. How did Lula die?
A. Sam is a dog and Lula is a fish. Sam pushed over the fish bowl.
Q. What seven letters did the robber say when he saw nothing in the safe?
A. "O I C U R M T!"
Q. What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
A. "You look flushed."
Q. What goes around the world but stays in one place?
A. A stamp.
Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.
Q. What's it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A. A meltdown!
Q. What kind of bug goes Zzub Zzub?
A. A bumble bee flying backward!
Q. Why don't football players get hot?
A. Because of all their fans!
Q. What's a cow's favourite drink?
Q. Why did the surfer wear a baseball mitt?
A. He wanted to catch a wave.
Q. What has words but never speaks?
A. A book.
Q. In what way can the letter A help a deaf lady?
A. It can make her hear.
Q. Why did the elephant paint his fingernails red?
A. So he could hide in a bowl of cherries.
Q. What do polar bears like to snack on?
A. Eskimo thighs.
Q. A man pushes a car to a hotel and realizes he's bankrupt. Why?
A. He's playing Monopoly!
Q. How did the cow get through the crowd?
A. He shouted MOOve!
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