Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. Why did the young cat get arrested ?
A. For his litter!
Q. What has to be broken before you can use it?
A. An egg.
Q. What do you call a cow with no legs?
A. Ground beef.
Q. When does 10 + 3 = 1?
A. On the clock.
Q. Why did the dinosaur bring string to the baseball game?
A. He wanted to tie up the score!
Q. Where do sheep get their hair cut?
A. At the bah bah shop.
Q. What garden has the most vegetables?
A. Flash garden!
Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!
Q. Why are fish smart?
A. Because they travel in schools.
Q. What did the paint give the wall on their first anniversary?
A. A new coat.
Q. What do you get if you cross a dino and a dog?
A. A dog a sore!
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A. What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
Q. What did one burp say to the next?
A. Let's be stinkers and sneak out the back!
Q. What loses its head every day and gets it back every night?
A. A pillow.
Q. Which fish costs the most?
A. A gold fish!
Q. Where do bees go after they are married?
A. On their HONEY-moon!
Q. What is green and hangs off trees?
A. Giraffe snot.
Q. Why couldn't the girl dial 911?
A. She couldn't find the 11.
Q. What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Q. What do you call a dancing ant?
A. A dANTcer!
Q. Mary and John were sitting in the family room one night. John was watching TV and Mary was reading a book. All of a sudden the power went out, so John decided to go to bed, but Mary kept on reading without any artificial light. How is this possible?
A. Mary was blind and was reading braile!
Q. If you have a referee in football and an umpire in cricket, what do you have in bowls?
Q. What did the cannibal say after he ate a clown?
A. "That tasted funny!"
Q. What fish will a greedy fisher catch?
Q. Why are ghosts always hungry?
A. Because the food goes right through them!
Q. I am tall when I am young and short when I am old. What am I?
A. A candle.
Q. What do you call a shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?
Q. What is green and white when it is up and red when it hits the ground?
A. A watermelon.
Q. What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says throw out that gum and a train says chew, chew!
Q. Q. Rail road crossing, watch out for the cars, can you spell that with out any Rs?
Q. How do you make a Kleenex dance?
A. You put a little boogie in it!
Q. Why do teachers give you homework?
A. Just to annoy you.
Q. What grows if you feed it but dies if it drinks?
Q. What has a tongue but can't talk?
A. A shoe!
Q. What's black and white and red all over?
A. A sunburned zebra!
Q. Why couldn't the shipmates play cards?
A. The captain was sitting on the deck!
Q. Why do hair dressers always get places faster?
A. Because they know all the short cuts.
Q. What's yellow and goes 50 miles per hour?
A. A banana in a washing machine.
Q. Why couldn't the bike stand up on it's own?
A. Because it was two-tired!
Q. Why was the computer late to work?
A. He had a hard-drive.
Q. What kind of music do stars listen to?
A. The starry blues.
Q. What money do dogs and cats have?
A. Kitty cash and doggy dollars.
Q. What did the tie say to the hat?
A. "You go on a head and I'll hang around here."
Q. If you're Scottish when you go into the bathroom and you're Scottish when you go out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the toilet?
A. European (you are peeing).
Q. What word, if spelled right is wrong and spelled wrong is right?
Q. Why do sharks live in salty water?
A. Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Q. Why did the toilet paper want to roll down the hill?
A. To get to the bottom.
Q. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A. "Thank you, I will never part with it."
Q. Why is the White House spotless?
A. Because it lives in WASHington!
Q. What runs but has no legs?
A. A nose!
Q. There was a man who walked into a bar and asked if he could have a glass of water but the bartender pointed a gun at him and the man who asked for water said thank you and left. Why did he say thank you?
A. Because the man had the hiccups.
Q. What do you call a rabbit with the sniffles?
A. A runny bunny.
Q. How do you throw a tent?
A. You pitch it!
Q. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A. A dino-snore!
Q. What did the fish say to the chip?
A. "We were made for each other."
Q. Why did the turtle cross the street?
A. To get to the Shell station.
Q. What is a volcano?
A. A mountain with heartburn!
Q. What did the math book say to the other math book?
A. "I've got a lot of problems."
Q. I have two coins in my pocket and they equal 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the coins in my pocket?
A. A nickel and a dime, I said only one of them is not a nickel.
Q. Why can't a car play football?
A. Because its only got one boot.
Q. Why did the banana factory shut down?
A. Because they chucked out all the bent ones!
Q. Who invented King Arthur's round table?
A. Sir Cumference!
Q. I usually wear a yellow coat. I usually have a black tip and wherever I go I make marks. What am I?
A. A pencil.
Q. What's black and white and can climb trees?
A. A panda.
Q. Why didn't the police catch the banana?
A. Because it split!
Q. What two candies are the smartest?
A. Smarties and Nerds.
Q. Take me out of the box, scratch my head, I am now black but once was red. What am I?
A. A match!
Q. How is bubble gum similar to a Wookie?
A. It's Chewy.
Q. Why did the mattress go the doctor?
A. It had spring fever.
Q. What is red and has fangs?
A. An apple. I lied about the fangs!
Q. What is the cat's favorite button on the remote?
Q. Why do cats always go after mice and birds?
A. Because cats like fast food.
Q. Which letter of the alphabet keeps us waiting?
A. Q. (queue)
Q. What has no lid, key, or hinge yet golden treasure is hid inside?
A. An egg!
Q. Does a match box?
A. No, but a tin can!
Q. What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A. A cloud!
Q. What runs but never walks?
Q. A rabbit hops by IHOP. He looks at the sign. What does he say?
A. "Big deal, so do I."
Q. What gets smaller as it gets higher?
A. An airplane!
Q. Why did the children eat their homework?
A. Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Q. How can you tell which end is the head of a worm?
A. Tickle the middle and see where it laughs!
Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.
Q. A man pushes a car to a hotel and realizes he's bankrupt. Why?
A. He's playing Monopoly!
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow, a sheep and a goat?
A. The Milky Baa-r kid.
Q. What kind of car does a cow drive?
A. A CATTLEac.
Q. What animal should you not play cards with?
A. A Cheetah!
Q. What's it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A. A meltdown!
Q. What do you do if something charges at you?
A. You take away its credit card!
Q. I have 7 children half of them are boys, what is the other half?
A. They were all boys.
Q. Hit me hard and I will crack but you'll never stop me from staring back. What am I?
A. A mirror!
Q. 30 people are in a room, no way in, no way out. Don't ask me how they got in. Someone counted and they got 34-heads. How is that possible?
A. 30 foreheads!
Q. What do polar bears like to snack on?
A. Eskimo thighs.
Q. Why didn't the Dallas Cowboys want to beat the Denver Broncos in a game?
A. Because they needed a ride home!
Q. Why doesn't the sun go to college?
A. Because it has a million degrees!
Q. What do you call a bell that can do gymnastics?
A. A flexi-bell.
Q. There are two dads and two sons that went fishing. Everyone caught a fish, but only three fish were caught. How is this possible?
A. There was a grandfather, a dad and a son.
Q. What type of house weighs the least?
A. A lighthouse.
Q. What has lots of teeth but can't chew a thing?
A. A comb!
Q. What did the tree say to the light bulb?
A. "Hey! Just had a bright idea!"
Q. What is always blue (sad) but always smiles?
A. A smurf.
Q. Why couldn't the elephant move?
A. Because he couldn't lift his trunk!
Q. Why did the baby chick cross the road?
A. It was take-your-child-to-work day.
Q. What kind of teacher passes gas?
A. A tutor!
Q. What has hands but no arms?
A. A clock.
Q. Tall in the morning, short at noon, gone at night but I'll be back soon. What am I?
A. A shadow!
Q. What is the laziest mountain in the world?
A. Mount Ever-rest!
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
A. Bacon and legs!
Q. What is in and out, big and small, short and tall, up and down, and all around?
A. Life and time.
Q. What starts and ends with an O and has hi in the middle?
Q. What did the spider do when he went on his computer?
A. He went on his web site!
Q. Why is U the happiest letter?
A. Because it is in the middle of fun
Q. What did the skeleton say after dinner?
A. "Everything I eat goes right through me!"
Q. What did the creek say to the brook?
A. "Stop babbling!"
Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"
Q. Why did the whale laugh?
A. Because he saw the sea's bottom.
Q. What is something you will never see again?
A. The past.
Q. What did the judge say when the skunk got off the stage?
A. "You stink!"
Q. Where can you always find happiness?
A. In a dictionary!
Q. What is a cow's favourite movie?
Q. What has words but never speaks?
A. A book.
Q. What's a monkey's favorite snack?
A. Chocolate chimp cookies.
Q. What can fill up the the room but takes no space?
Q. Why did the boy scream when he opened the fridge?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.
Q. Why did the horse cross the road?
A. To get to the other NEIGH-bourhood.
Q. Why did Batman cross his legs?
A. He had to go to the BATroom!
Q. Why did the monkey cross the road?
A. Because the chicken retired.
Q. What is the hardest thing to hold that even the strongest person in the world has difficulty with?
A. Your breath.
Q. Why did the jellybean go to school?
A. To become a smartie!
Q. What pet does everybody have?
A. A carPET!
Q. Why did the cow eat the tight rope walker?
A. Because he wanted a balanced meal!
Q. Why was the math book unhappy?
A. Because he had too many problems!
Q. Why did the teacher draw on the window?
A. Because he wanted his lesson to be very clear!
Q. What did the magazine say to the pencil?
A. "You are looking very sharp today."
Q. What object is king of the classroom?
A. The ruler!
Q. Mary was shot in the head. She managed to avoid being hospitalized and she's as healthy as can be. How can this be?
A. She had a modeling audition. So, they took her head shots.
Q. If I did this equation, 23x45+27x99= What answer would I get?
A. A very big number!
Q. What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
A. "I lava you!"
Q. Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A. Because they are always a little short!
Q. Why did the goose cross the road?
A. He didn't want to be called a chicken!
Q. I am a rock group that has four members, all of whom are dead, one of which was assassinated. What group am I?
A. Mount Rushmore! Get it, rock group?
Q. What letter is a vegetable?
Q. What did the cross eyed teacher say to the principal?
A. "I can't control my pupils!"
Q. Why wouldn't the oyster give up her pearl?
A. She was shellfish [selfish].
Q. Who does Frankenstein invite to his party?
A. Anyone he can gobble up!
Q. Why did the new boy steal a chair from the classroom?
A. Because the teacher told him to take a seat.
Q. Why did the dog stay out of the sun?
A. So he wouldn't be a hotdog.
Q. What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?
A. A synonym roll.
Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
Q. Why couldn't the skeleton laugh?
A. Because he lost his funny bone.
Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.
Riddles | Knock-Knock
Jokes | Jokes
Animal Jokes | Banana Jokes | Cat Jokes | Chicken Jokes | Computer Jokes | Dinosaur Jokes
Doctor Jokes | Dog Jokes | Elephant Jokes | Food Jokes | Insect Jokes | Movie Jokes
Music Jokes | Outer Space Jokes | School Jokes | Sports Jokes
Christmas Jokes | Easter Jokes | Halloween Jokes | St. Patrick's Day Jokes | Thanksgiving Jokes | Valentine Jokes | Winter Jokes