Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. What do you call a dancing ant?
A. A dANTcer!
Q. What is a photograph's favorite game?
Q. Why did the monkey cross the road?
A. Because the chicken retired.
Q. What is a cat's favorite color?
Q. Which day is mostly avoided by fish?
Q. What did the ghost say when it sneezed?
A. "Ahh BOO!"
Q. Why is Cinderella a bad football player?
A. Because she has a pumpkin as a coach!
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
A. Jurassic Pork.
Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?
A. CELL phones.
Q. Why was the little bird punished?
A. It was caught peeping in school.
Q. Why can't computers play tennis?
A. They try to surf the net.
Q. How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
A. A buccaneer (A buck an ear)
Q. What fish can help you build a house?
A. A hammerhead shark.
Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!
Q. How do you make varnish disappear?
A. Take away the R!
Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.
Q. Why did the grandma sit in the rocking chair with her roller blades on?
A. Because she wanted to rock and roll.
Q. Why did the leprechaun cross the road?
A. To get to the pot of gold.
Q. What's a monkey's favorite snack?
A. Chocolate chimp cookies.
Q. What did the ghost say to his wife?
A. "You look so BOOtiful."
Q. Why did the square and triangle go to the gym?
A. To stay in shape!
Q. Why did the tightrope walker visit the bank?
A. He wanted to get his balance!
Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
Q. What did Delaware?
A. A New Jersey!
Q. Why couldn't the eight year old get into the pirate movie?
A. Because it was rated ARRRR!
Q. Why is the ocean always grumpy?
A. You'd be grumpy too if you had crabs on your bottom!
Q. There was a man who walked into a bar and asked if he could have a glass of water but the bartender pointed a gun at him and the man who asked for water said thank you and left. Why did he say thank you?
A. Because the man had the hiccups.
Q. Why did the crab cross the road?
A. To get to the other the tide.
Q. Where does a cow go when he's bored?
A. To the MOOvies.
Q. What did the fish say to the chip?
A. "We were made for each other."
Q. What do you call a bear with no ears?
Q. Why don't skeletons fight?
A. Because they don't have the guts!
Q. What has four legs, a tail, whiskers and cuts grass?
A. A lawn MEOW-er!
Q. What did the baker give his wife for their anniversary?
Q. What is an army man's favorite month?
Q. What happens when you cross the tango and a waltz?
A. A wango!
Q. What has a neck but can't swallow?
A. A bottle.
Q. What do you call a grandfather clock?
A. An old timer!
Q. Why is the White House spotless?
A. Because it lives in WASHington!
Q. What do you do if something charges at you?
A. You take away its credit card!
Q. Why did the farmer let his cows eat the tall grass?
A. Because it needed to get moooed! (Mowed)
Q. What is the end of everything?
A. The letter G.
Q. Why was the calculator sad?
A. Because it had too many problems to solve!
Q. If a very small fish married a young dog, what would their baby be called?
A. A guppy puppy.
Q. What garden has the most vegetables?
A. Flash garden!
Q. Why did the bread cross the road?
A. To BUTTER the other side!
Q. Why is a giraffe's neck so long?
A. Because their feet stink.
Q. Why did the student bring scissors to class?
A. He wanted to cut class!
Q. There are 2 cats, one is French and the other English. The French cat's name was Un Deux Trois and the English cat's name was One Two Three. Both cats think they're better than the other. To determine this they have a swimming contest. Which cat wins and why?
A. The English cat, because Un Deux Trois Quatre Cinq! (Un Deux Trois cat sank)
Q. What do people have in common with a math book?
A. We've all got a lot of problems!
Q. Why does the man think the darkness is heavy?
A. Because it isn't light.
Q. Paul is six feet tall. He is an assistant in a butcher shop. He wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
Q. What did one wall say to the other wall?
A. "I'll meet you at the corner."
Q. What kind of bus crossed the ocean?
A. Christopher ColumBUS!
Q. How do you make a swordfish like the library?
A. Take away the S in its name!
Q. Why is England the wettest country?
A. Because the queen has reigned there for years!
Q. What do you say in the evening to a soldier in shining armor?
A. Night, night, Knight.
Q. How do you make an octopus laugh?
A. Ten Tickles (Tentacles)!
Q. What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says throw out that gum and a train says chew, chew!
Q. Why did the oak tree have to eat his ice cream in a dish?
A. The pine tree wouldn't give him a cone!
Q. What money do dogs and cats have?
A. Kitty cash and doggy dollars.
Q. Why was the clock in the cafeteria always slow?
A. Because every lunch it went back four seconds!
Q. Where does a 600 pound gorilla sit?
A. Anywhere he wants!
Q. What is the smartest city in America?
A. Alabama because it has four A's and one B!
Q. What does a pickle say when he wants to play cards?
A. "Dill me in!"
Q. What do you call a 100-year-old ant?
Q. What kind of car does Humpty Dumpty drive?
A. A Yolks Wagon!
Q. What's the difference between winter and a hurt football player?
A. One is cold out and the other one is out cold.
Q. What was Mr. Cow and Mrs. Cow's favorite time together?
A. When they went on their honeyMOOn.
Q. What does a wolf say on Halloween?
A. "Happy HOWLoween!"
Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To show the possums how it's done.
Q. What jumps higher than a building?
A. Everything, buildings don't jump.
Q. What has ears but can't hear?
A. A corn field!
Q. Why did the coach go to the bank?
A. To get his quarterback.
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
Q. Why did the starfish breakup with the lobster?
A. Because he was SHELLfish.
Q. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?
A. Joseph, Pharoah made a ruler out of him.
Q. What goes up but does not go down?
A. Your age!
Q. Mary was shot in the head. She managed to avoid being hospitalized and she's as healthy as can be. How can this be?
A. She had a modeling audition. So, they took her head shots.
Q. Why do people like vampires so much?
A. Because they are FANGtastic!
Q. Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired?
A. Because he couldn't keep his calves together!
Q. Why couldn't the shipmates play cards?
A. The captain was sitting on the deck!
Q. How do you make Lady Gaga mad?
A. Poker face!
Q. Rail road tracks, look out for cars! How do you spell that without any Rs?
Q. What kind of bird uses ink to write?
A. A PEN-guin!
Q. What's black and white and can climb trees?
A. A panda.
Q. Why is arithmetic hard work?
A. All those numerals you have to carry.
Q. Why can't a car play football?
A. Because its only got one boot.
Q. I have 7 children half of them are boys, what is the other half?
A. They were all boys.
Q. What starts with T, ends with T, and is filled with T?
A. A teapot!
Q. What do ghosts wear on their feet?
Q. Why do sharks live in salty water?
A. Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Q. Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window?
A. He wanted to see time fly!
Q. There is a black house, grey house, red house, yellow house, green house and brown house. What colour house does President Obama live in?
A. The White House!
Q. Which wolf got lost in the woods?
A. The WHEREwolf.
Q. Why did the student drown?
A. All her grades were below C-level!
Q. Why did the baker go to jail?
A. Because he got caught beating the eggs.
Q. Where do bees go after they are married?
A. On their HONEY-moon!
Q. Why did the children eat their homework?
A. Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Q. Why were the police suspicious of the window drapes?
A. They were shady.
Q. How do you start a teddy bear race?
A. Ready, teddy, go!
Q. In what way can the letter A help a deaf lady?
A. It can make her hear.
Q. What is the British Secret Service's best yellow-haired spy?
A. James Blonde!
Q. What is the fastest country in the world?
Q. How did the man build up his flea collar business?
A. He started from scratch.
Q. What way are the letter A and noon alike?
A. Both of them are in the middle of the day.
Q. What's a monster's favourite game?
A. Swallow the Leader!
Q. Why did Batman cross his legs?
A. He had to go to the BATroom!
Q. I have two coins in my pocket and they equal 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the coins in my pocket?
A. A nickel and a dime, I said only one of them is not a nickel.
Q. What kind of birds always stay together?
Q. What dog loves to take a shower?
A. A shamPOODLE.
Q. Why is there no air in space?
A. Because the Milky Way would go bad.
Q. Which baseball team do puppies play for?
A. The New York Pets.
Q. If you have three 7 foot long ropes, how many feet do you have?
A. You have two feet!
Q. How is bubble gum similar to a Wookie?
A. It's Chewy.
Q. If the red house is in the left and the blue house is on the right, where is the white house ?
A. Washington DC.
Q. Why did the fish tell excuses?
A. To get off the hook!
Q. Why did the young cat get arrested ?
A. For his litter!
Q. What does a toad say when it sees something great?
A. "TOADaly Awesome!"
Q. What is a porcupine's favourite game?
Q. Why was the girl staring at the juice box?
A. Because it said: "Concentrate."
Q. What is red and has fangs?
A. An apple. I lied about the fangs!
Q. How did Burger King propose to his girlfriend?
A. With an onion ring.
Q. Mary and John were sitting in the family room one night. John was watching TV and Mary was reading a book. All of a sudden the power went out, so John decided to go to bed, but Mary kept on reading without any artificial light. How is this possible?
A. Mary was blind and was reading braile!
Q. What kind of bats swing upside down?
Q. Why was the music teacher not able to open his class room?
A. Because his keys were on the piano.
Q. Why wouldn't the oyster give up her pearl?
A. She was shellfish [selfish].
Q. Why is U the happiest letter?
A. Because it is in the middle of fun
Q. What kind of shoes do mice like?
Q. What is a bird's favorite treat?
Q. Why did the cow eat the tight rope walker?
A. Because he wanted a balanced meal!
Q. Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?
Q. Why was the cumputer cold at night?
A. It forgot to close its windows.
Q. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?
A. The alpha-BAT.
Q. Do you want to hear a construction joke?
A. Sorry I'm still working on it!
Q. What did the scientist say to the hydrogen atom that claimed it lost an electron?
A. "Are you positive?"
Q. Imagine you are in a boat. You were being circled by sharks. One shark is about to bite you. What should you do?
A. Stop imagining!
Q. How come my uncle does not brush his hair?
A. Because he is bald.
Q. Why didn't the squirrel cross the telephone wire?
A. Because the line was busy.
Q. Sam, Lula, Mike, and Kayla all live in a house. Mike and Kayla went out to the movies and when they got back Lula was on the floor dead in a pile of broken glass and water. Sam was on the couch sleeping and didn't know what happened. How did Lula die?
A. Sam is a dog and Lula is a fish. Sam pushed over the fish bowl.
Q. What has a lot of keys but can't open doors?
A. A piano.
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a camel?
A. A lumpy milkshake!
Q. Which nail does a carpenter hate to hit?
A. A thumbnail.
Q. Take me out of the box, scratch my head, I am now black but once was red. What am I?
A. A match!
Q. What do you call a potato that was crushed?
Q. Why did the rooster cross the road?
A. Because he wasn't a chicken.
Q. What letter is a drink?
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
A. Bacon and legs!
Q. Why did the son put his father on top of the freezer?
A. He wanted an ice pop!
Q. Why didn't Batman and Robin go fishing?
A. Because Robin ate all the the worms.
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