Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. What kind of shoes does a spy wear?
Q. What is the end of everything?
A. The letter G.
Q. What object is king of the classroom?
A. The ruler!
Q. Why did the grandma sit in the rocking chair with her roller blades on?
A. Because she wanted to rock and roll.
Q. Why do people like vampires so much?
A. Because they are FANGtastic!
Q. Why did the baseball player get arrested?
A. Because he was caught stealing second base!
Q. What way are the letter A and noon alike?
A. Both of them are in the middle of the day.
Q. Where does the word done come before start?
A. In the dictionary!
Q. Which bet can't be won?
Q. What did the bee say when he returned to the hive?
A. "Honey, I'm home!"
Q. Why did the turkey cross the road?
A. Because it was the chicken's day off!
Q. What animal is NOT allowed to play in games or contests?
A. Cheetahs (cheaters)
Q. What is a mouth that won't shut up?
A. A blabber mouth.
Q. If you have three 7 foot long ropes, how many feet do you have?
A. You have two feet!
Q. What has four eyes but can't see?
Q. Why were the police suspicious of the window drapes?
A. They were shady.
Q. Can February March?
A. No, but April May.
Q. What's the difference between a dirty dime and a clean nickel?
A. 5 cents.
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
A. Jurassic Pork.
Q. Why couldn't the girl finish her music homework?
A. Because she forgot her notebook!
Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall?
Q. What vegetable has eyes but can't see?
A. A potato.
Q. What is a balloon's least favorite kind of music?
Q. What do you do if something charges at you?
A. You take away its credit card!
Q. Why were the pirates so good at singing?
A. They were working on the high Cs.
Q. 30 people are in a room, no way in, no way out. Don't ask me how they got in. Someone counted and they got 34-heads. How is that possible?
A. 30 foreheads!
Q. Why did the young cat get arrested ?
A. For his litter!
Q. Why did the banana factory shut down?
A. Because they chucked out all the bent ones!
Q. Why was the ant confused?
A. Because all of his uncles were ants!
Q. What has two heads, one tail and six legs?
A. A man on a horse.
Q. What do you get when you cross a hammock and a dog?
A. A rocker spaniel.
Q. What did the cannibal say after he ate a clown?
A. "That tasted funny!"
Q. Why did the TV go out with the heater?
A. Because he thought she was hot!
Q. What do you call an Italian cow that likes coffee?
Q. What do you get when you put jeans in the microwave?
A. Four hotpockets.
Q. What does a surprised iceberg say?
A. "Goodness Glacius!"
Q. Who invented King Arthur's round table?
A. Sir Cumference!
Q. Why did the lamb go to the river?
A. To get a BAA-th!
Q. Where do bees go after they are married?
A. On their HONEY-moon!
Q. What did the candle say to the other candle?
A. "Are you going out tonight?"
Q. Why did the firefighter put his belt on?
A. To hold his pants up!
Q. Why did the girl bring a ruler to bed with her?
A. She wanted to see how long she slept.
Q. Why did the farmer let his cows eat the tall grass?
A. Because it needed to get moooed! (Mowed)
Q. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?
A. Nothing, they just waved!
Q. What is Santa's favorite snack?
A. Ho, hos!
Q. What's it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum?
A. A meltdown!
Q. What makes seven even?
A. Taking the S away!
Q. Why is arithmetic hard work?
A. All those numerals you have to carry.
Q. There was a little moron and a big moron sitting on the edge of a bridge. The big moron fell off but the little one didn't, how come?
A. He was a little more on!
Q. What is the laziest mountain in the world?
A. Mount Ever-rest!
Q. Paul is six feet tall. He is an assistant in a butcher shop. He wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
Q. What sits outside all year long and is Irish?
A. Paddy O'furniture.
Q. What did the 0 say to the 8?
A. "Nice belt."
Q. What has 3 feet but cannot walk?
A. A yardstick!
Q. What game do tornados play?
Q. What animal sleeps with its shoes on?
A. A horse.
Q. What relatives are dependent on U?
A. Aunt, uncle, cousin. They all need U.
Q. Why should you never shower with a pokemon?
A. Because they Pikachu (peek at you).
Q. What is a flower between your nose and your chin?
A. Two lips. (Tulips)
Q. What did the scientist say to the hydrogen atom that claimed it lost an electron?
A. "Are you positive?"
Q. Why does the man think the darkness is heavy?
A. Because it isn't light.
Q. Why was the music teacher not able to open his class room?
A. Because his keys were on the piano.
Q. Where are the most cows born?
Q. What do people have in common with a math book?
A. We've all got a lot of problems!
Q. Why did the baker go to jail?
A. Because he got caught beating the eggs.
Q. How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
A. Poker Face!
Q. Can you name two things that have an eye buy can't see?
A. A needle and a hurricane!
Q. What do fish take to stay alive?
A. Vitamin sea.
Q. Why is the ocean always grumpy?
A. You'd be grumpy too if you had crabs on your bottom!
Q. What do you call a person with a tree for a briefcase?
A. A branch manager.
Q. What is served on a table with gatherings of two or four, and is white and round?
A. A ping pong ball.
Q. Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A. Because they are always a little short!
Q. Why do mushrooms like to tell jokes?
A. Because they're a fungi!
Q. What letter is a drink?
Q. How did the teacher knit a suit of armor?
A. She used steel wool!
Q. What do you call a dark colored horse that really scares you?
A. A nightMARE!
Q. Hit me hard and I will crack but you'll never stop me from staring back. What am I?
A. A mirror!
Q. What did the fish say to the octopus while the octopus was eating?
A. Lend me a tentacle or 8.
Q. There are 10 cats in a boat. One cat jumped out of the boat. How many cats were left?
A. None, they were all copycats.
Q. Why was the cumputer cold at night?
A. It forgot to close its windows.
Q. Think of the person who lives in disguise, who deals in secrets and tells nothing but lies.
Next tell me what's always last to mend the middle of middle and end of the end.
And finally give me the sound often heard during the search for a hard to find word.
Now string them all together and answer me this:
What creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
A. A spider.
Q. What football team makes the most money?
A. The Buck-aneers.
Q. If you're Scottish when you go into the bathroom and you're Scottish when you go out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the toilet?
A. European (you are peeing).
Q. What did the sun say to the sheep and the cloud?
A. "Whoa, are y'all related?"
Q. Why can't computers play tennis?
A. They try to surf the net.
Q. If a man was born in Spain, raised in Russia, grew old in Greece and died in America, what is he?
Q. Why doesn't the sun go to college?
A. Because it has a million degrees!
Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. Because she was getting tired of just standing there!
Q. What's the difference between winter and a hurt football player?
A. One is cold out and the other one is out cold.
Q. Why is U the happiest letter?
A. Because it is in the middle of fun
Q. You're riding on a horse and you realize there's a lion chasing you and a giraffe is in front of you. What do you do?
A. Jump off the merry-go-round!
Q. Why didn't the police catch the banana?
A. Because it split!
Q. Why did the surfer wear a baseball mitt?
A. He wanted to catch a wave.
Q. What part of a fish weighs the most?
A. Its scales.
Q. Where is the best place to leave a dog when you go to a ball game?
A. In the barking lot.
Q. Where does a penguin go to visit his aunt?
Q. Why don't ducks get letters?
A. Because they already have bills!
Q. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and put the elephant in and then close the door.
Q. What did the zero say to the eight?
A. "Oh, I like your belt!"
Q. What is green and sings?
A. Elvis Parsley.
Q. What letter is a European bird?
Q. What kind of place should you never take a dog?
A. To the Flea Market.
Q. Why did Peter Pan always fly and never stop?
A. Because he could never never land.
Q. What is the British Secret Service's best yellow-haired spy?
A. James Blonde!
Q. Which is the best month for a parade?
Q. What do babies and basketball players have in common?
A. They dribble.
Q. A tomato, a cabbage and a hose were in a race. The tomato was red and the cabbage was a vegetable. Who won?
A. The hose was running, the cabbage was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
Q. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?
A. He had no body to dance with!
Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!
Q. What did one leaf say to the other?
A. "See you next fall!!"
Q. What did the tornado ask the car?
A. "Wanna go for a spin?"
Q. What kind of flower lives between your mouth and your chin?
Q. What goes up when the rain comes down?
A. An umbrella!
Q. Why did the boy bury his flashlight?
A. Because the batteries were dead.
Q. Mary's mum had three children. One was called April, the second was May. What was the name of the last one?
Q. How do you get Pikachu on the bus?
A. You Pokemon!
Q. Why was the crab arrested?
A. For pinching!
Q. There was no moon and a black car with no headlights was driving on a black road. On the black road there was a black dog. The car avoided the dog. How is this possible?
A. It was daytime.
Q. What did the tree say to the light bulb?
A. "Hey! Just had a bright idea!"
Q. What do you call a man in a bush?
Q. What letter is a part of the head?
Q. What's the difference between a train and a teacher?
A. The teacher says, "Spit your gum out" and the train says, "Choo-choo!"
Q. What runs but never walks?
Q. What does a triceratops sit on?
A. It's tricera-bottom!
Q. Why do teachers give you homework?
A. Just to annoy you.
Q. What happened when the butcher backed up into the meat grinder?
A. He got a little behind in his work!
Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.
Q. What does an orange do when it takes a test?
A. It concentrates!
Q. Why did the hot dog wear a sweater?
A. Because it was a chili dog!
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
Q. What movie tells the tale of a pizza maker bitten by an arachnid?
A. Spi-dough Man.
Q. What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A. "I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand."
Q. Why didn't the lifegaurd save the hippie?
A. Because he was too far out, man.
Q. Who was the first deer in space?
A. Buck Rogers.
Q. What pet does everybody have?
A. A carPET!
Q. How do you make a goldfish age?
A. Take away the g in goldfish.
Q. What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Q. What did the witch have for snack?
A. A sandwich.
Q. What do you call a deaf dinosaur?
A. Anything you like, he can't hear you!
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow, a sheep and a goat?
A. The Milky Baa-r kid.
Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A. Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?!
Q. Does a match box?
A. No, but a tin can!
Q. What country has the most church bells?
Q. What do you call a 100-year-old ant?
Q. How much is the moon worth?
A. One dollar, because it has four quarters.
Q. What did the vampire say to his wife?
A. "Your neck looks slimmer."
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow with a smurf?
A. Blue cheese!
Q. Where do dogs go when they lose their tail?
A. To the reTAIL store.
Q. What is white when dirty and black when clean?
A. A blackboard.
Q. What do you call a kangaroo that sneezes alot?
A. A kanga-choo.
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