Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. What did the judge say when the skunk got off the stage?
A. "You stink!"
Q. Why was the elephant afraid of the computer store?
A. Because they sold the world's best mice.
Q. What way do the cows like to go?
A. The milky way!
Q. What did the baker give his wife for their anniversary?
Q. What sort of animal is a slug?
A. A snail with housing problems!
Q. Why did the doofus climb the glass wall?
A. So he could see what was on the other side.
Q. What's the difference between a train and a teacher?
A. The teacher says, "Spit your gum out" and the train says, "Choo-choo!"
Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"
Q. What do you call a crab that will not share?
A. A selfish. (Shellfish)
Q. Why did the nose feel sad?
A. Because he always got picked on!
Q. Why did the mattress go the doctor?
A. It had spring fever.
Q. What is black and white and red all over?
A. A zebra with the chicken pox.
Q. What do a duck and a tricycle have in common?
A. They both have a steering wheel, except for the duck.
Q. What do race car driver's eat?
A. Fast food!
Q. There was a man who walked into a bar and asked if he could have a glass of water but the bartender pointed a gun at him and the man who asked for water said thank you and left. Why did he say thank you?
A. Because the man had the hiccups.
Q. What do you do when you see a spaceman?
A. Park in it!
Q. What is a dog that sneezes?
Q. What is a boomerang that doesn't come back?
A. A stick!
Q. How can a rose ride a bike?
A. It uses its petals!
Q. What goes around and around but never gets dizzy?
Q. What do ghosts like for dessert?
A. BOOberry pie!
Q. Are you a triangle?
A. 'Cause you sure are acute! ;)
Q. What did the shark say when he bumped into a whale?
A. "I didn't do it on porpoise!" (purpose)
Q. What has 3 feet but cannot walk?
A. A yardstick!
Q. Sam, Lula, Mike, and Kayla all live in a house. Mike and Kayla went out to the movies and when they got back Lula was on the floor dead in a pile of broken glass and water. Sam was on the couch sleeping and didn't know what happened. How did Lula die?
A. Sam is a dog and Lula is a fish. Sam pushed over the fish bowl.
Q. What 10 letter word starts with gas?
A. An A-U-T-O-M-O-B-I-L-E.
Q. Which fish costs the most?
A. A gold fish!
Q. Why couldn't the bike stand up on it's own?
A. Because it was two-tired!
Q. What did the toilet say when he was playing cards?
Q. Why did the tightrope walker visit the bank?
A. He wanted to get his balance!
Q. If you say it you break it. What is it?
Q. What does a frog eat with his hamburger?
A. French Flies!
Q. Why didn't the mummy answer the phone?
A. He was all tied up!
Q. Where do famous dragons go after they retire?
A. The hall of flame!
Q. What happened to the shark when he ate too many keys?
A. He turned into the Lock-ness monster.
Q. What has a face and two hands but no arms or legs?
A. A clock.
Q. What is white on the outside, green on the inside and hops?
A. A frog sandwich.
Q. What do you call a shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?
Q. Why do mathematicians like airlines?
A. They use Pi-lots.
Q. If you have three 7 foot long ropes, how many feet do you have?
A. You have two feet!
Q. What can you catch but never throw?
A. A cold.
Q. What did one leaf say to the other?
A. "See you next fall!!"
Q. What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?
A. It gets wet.
Q. What did one raspberry say to the other on Valentine's Day?
A. "I love you berry much."
Q. What is a snake's favourite subject?
Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!
Q. What do you call a dead person in the closet?
A. The 1966 hide-and-go-seek champion.
Q. What did Delaware?
A. A New Jersey!
Q. What is black, white and red?
A. A panda with a rash!
Q. Which letter comes once in a minute, twice in a millennium but never in thousand years?
A. The letter M.
Q. What was the name of Noah's wife?
Q. Which is the loudest vowel?
A. The letter I. It is always in the midst of noise
Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.
Q. Why do gorillas have broad fingers?
A. Because they have large nostrils.
Q. What kind of shoes do mice like?
Q. An electric train is going north, which way is its smoke going?
A. Nowhere it's an electric train!
Q. Why did Goofy take a ladder to school?
A. Because he wanted to get to high school.
Q. What do you get if you cross a porcupine and a giraffe?
A. A seven metre long toothbrush!
Q. There are 10 cats in a boat. One cat jumped out of the boat. How many cats were left?
A. None, they were all copycats.
Q. What is the radius of a pumpkin?
Q. What do you need if you see a kangaroo 20 miles away?
A. I don't know, but you sure don't need glasses.
Q. What do you call an overweight E.T.?
A. Extra Cholesterol!
Q. What goes around the world but stays in one place?
A. A stamp.
Q. What did the flower say to the bike?
Q. Why did the skeleton flunk out?
A. His heart was not in it!
Q. What do you get when you cross a skeleton with a genie?
A. A wish bone!
Q. What kind of musical instrument do rats play?
A. Mouse organs.
Q. Why doesn't the sun go to college?
A. Because it has a million degrees!
Q. What type of house weighs the least?
A. A lighthouse.
Q. Which bet can't be won?
Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
Q. What do miners put on their face at night?
A. Coal cream.
Q. What do you call a bunny with fleas?
A. Bugs Bunny.
Q. What did the doctor say to the rocket ship?
A. "Time to get your booster shot!"
Q. What did the tie say to the hat?
A. "You go on a head and I'll hang around here."
Q. What do you get when you put a radio in a fridge?
A. Cool music!
Q. What cat likes living in water?
A. An octoPUSS!
Q. What do clothes and airplanes have in common?
Q. What do you get if you cross some bubble bath and a famous detective?
A. Sherlock Foams.
Q. In what way can the letter A help a deaf lady?
A. It can make her hear.
Q. Why did the coach go to the bank?
A. To get his quarterback.
Q. What stands in the middle of an ocean?
A. The letter E!
Q. I am the beginning of end and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation and I surround every place. What am I?
A. The letter E!
Q. Why did the children eat their homework?
A. Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Q. How do you catch a rabbit?
A. Make a noise like a carrot.
Q. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?
A. The alpha-BAT.
Q. What runs but has no legs?
A. A nose!
Q. What is green and hangs off trees?
A. Giraffe snot.
Q. What is the British Secret Service's best yellow-haired spy?
A. James Blonde!
Q. Why was the computer late to work?
A. He had a hard-drive.
Q. Why don't they play cards in Africa?
A. There are too many Cheetahs!
Q. What do you call a cow who learns how to belly dance?
A. A milkshake!
Q. Why was the coach mad?
A. Because he wanted his quarterback.
Q. What does the baby popcorn call his dad?
Q. What do you do when your fish is off?
A. You tune it up!
Q. Where do pencils come from?
Q. What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A. Time to get a new fence.
Q. What letter is a vegetable?
Q. Why did the girl jump up and down before taking her medicine?
A. Because the label said: Shake well before using!
Q. What do you call a football team with pigs?
A. Queens Pork Rangers.
Q. Why is the White House spotless?
A. Because it lives in WASHington!
Q. It is greater than God and more evil than devil. The poor have it. The rich need it and if you eat it you'll die. What is it?
Q. Why don't football players get hot?
A. Because of all their fans!
Q. What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
A. "You look flushed."
Q. Did you hear the joke about the egg that rolled in front of a truck?
A. Most people find they crack up!
Q. What starts with a P and ends with an E and has thousands of letters?
A. The Post Office!
Q. Why couldn't the elephant move?
A. Because he couldn't lift his trunk!
Q. What is served on a table with gatherings of two or four, and is white and round?
A. A ping pong ball.
Q. Why was the rope late for dinner?
A. It got tied up at the office.
Q. Why did the dinosaur wear a bandage?
A. Because he had a dino-SORE!
Q. What jumps higher than a building?
A. Everything, buildings don't jump.
Q. How do you know if a vampire has a sore throat?
A. You can hear him coughin'.
Q. Which country is the slipperiest?
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a camel?
A. A lumpy milkshake!
Q. What do you call a person who operates an armored car?
A. A safe driver.
Q. What do you get if you cross a dino and a dog?
A. A dog a sore!
Q. Why did the frog cross the road?
A. Because he wanted to show his girlfriend he had guts.
Q. Why did the surfer wear a baseball mitt?
A. He wanted to catch a wave.
Q. Mary was shot in the head. She managed to avoid being hospitalized and she's as healthy as can be. How can this be?
A. She had a modeling audition. So, they took her head shots.
Q. What did the cat need when it was having trouble seeing?
A. A PURRscription!
Q. What's a monster's favourite game?
A. Swallow the Leader!
Q. What kind of bats swing upside down?
Q. What has the fur of a cat, the whiskers of a cat, ears of a car, a tail of a cat, but is not a cat?
A. A kitten.
Q. How did the cow get through the crowd?
A. He shouted MOOve!
Q. Why did the bank robber take a bath?
A. So he could make a clean getaway.
Q. What are the strongest days of the week?
A. Saturday and Sunday because all the rest are WEAK days!
Q. What kind of bagel can fly?
A. A plain bagel.
Q. A cowboy rode into town on Friday, stayed for 3 days and left on Friday. How did he do it?
A. His horse's name was Friday.
Q. Why were the pirates so good at singing?
A. They were working on the high Cs.
Q. What's an insect's favorite sport?
Q. Why did the orange get stuck up the on the mountain?
A. Because he ran out of juice.
Q. How many letters are in the alphabet?
A. 11, T-H-E A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
Q. What did the dragon say after laying 50 eggs?
A. "I'm EGGShausted!"
Q. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?
A. He had no body to dance with!
Q. What is a crate's favorite sport?
Q. Why did the apple cuddle the orange?
A. Juice because he wanted a squeeze!
Q. Why was the ghost on the cheerleading squad?
A. It wanted to add a little team spirit.
Q. What did the duck put in its soup?
Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. A slug.
Q. What is black and white and red all over?
A. An injured penguin.
Q. How do you know when a dumb person has been on the computer?
A. There's white-out all over the screen.
Q. Where did the mother monster put her child when she was at work?
A. At day-SCARE!
Q. What do you call an Italian cow that likes coffee?
Q. What do dogs and trees have in common?
Q. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?
A. Nothing, they just waved!
Q. Why did the boy bury his flashlight?
A. Because the batteries were dead.
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
Q. What do you call a square that's been in an accident?
A. A WRECKtangle.
Q. What is an army man's favorite month?
Q. How do you get rid of a boomerang?
A. Throw it down a one way street!
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