Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. Why don't football players get hot?
A. Because of all their fans!
Q. Mary was shot in the head. She managed to avoid being hospitalized and she's as healthy as can be. How can this be?
A. She had a modeling audition. So, they took her head shots.
Q. What can you serve but never eat?
A. A tennis ball!
Q. How do you catch a school of fish?
A. With a bookworm.
Q. How do you make varnish disappear?
A. Take away the R!
Q. What did the magazine say to the pencil?
A. "You are looking very sharp today."
Q. What did the zero say to the eight?
A. "Oh, I like your belt!"
Q. What is a cat's favorite color?
Q. How does Lady Gaga like her meat?
A. Raw raw raw!
Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?
A. CELL phones.
Q. Why did Batman cross his legs?
A. He had to go to the BATroom!
Q. What is a math teacher's favourite dessert?
Q. What does the lion say to his friends before a hunt?
A. "Let us prey."
Q. What has two heads and runs faster the longer it stands?
A. An hourglass.
Q. What has four eyes but can't see?
Q. Why did the duck cross the road?
A. Because it thought it was a chicken.
Q. What movie tells the tale of a pizza maker bitten by an arachnid?
A. Spi-dough Man.
Q. What happens if you call 611 for the police?
A. The police car comes to you upside down!
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
Q. What bird can write?
Q. As I get older, I become shorter. What am I?
A. A pencil!
Q. What do you get if you cross a cow, a sheep and a goat?
A. The Milky Baa-r kid.
Q. What fish will a greedy fisher catch?
Q. What letter is a drink?
Q. What goes around and around but never gets dizzy?
Q. Why did the one handed man cross the road?
A. To get to the second hand shop!
Q. What did the dragon say after laying 50 eggs?
A. "I'm EGGShausted!"
Q. What time do you go to the dentist?
A. Tooth hurty!
Q. What's big, grey and has red spots?
A. An elephant with chicken pox!
Q. Why did the student drown?
A. All her grades were below C-level!
Q. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and put the elephant in and then close the door.
Q. What do you call a football player whose helmet is too tight?
A. Call him anthing you want, he can't hear you!
Q. What does Frankenstein's wife wear on her face to keep it smooth?
Q. Why did the stupid racing driver make ten pit stops during the race?
A. He was asking for directions!
Q. Why were the police suspicious of the window drapes?
A. They were shady.
Q. What's better than 24?
Q. There are two dads and two sons that went fishing. Everyone caught a fish, but only three fish were caught. How is this possible?
A. There was a grandfather, a dad and a son.
Q. What letter is a European bird?
Q. Why did the orange lose the race?
A. Because it ran out of juice.
Q. Why was Cinderella thrown off the football team?
A. Because she ran away from the ball!
Q. What tree do fingers grow off of?
A. A palm tree!
Q. What does a polar bear use to keep his head warm?
A. A polar ice cap.
Q. What do you call a super hero who has lost his powers?
A. A super-zero.
Q. What is the difference between a worn out runner and a worn out vet?
A. One's dog tired and the other is tired of dogs.
Q. What did the plate say to the other plate?
A. "Food's on me tonight!"
Q. What did the happy slice of cheese say to the sad slice of cheese?
A. "Aw, it will be okay! Everything is GOUDA!"
Q. What do you call a flying jelly?
A. A jelly copter.
Q. What can you put in a barrel that makes it lighter?
Q. How do you get Pikachu on the bus?
A. You Pokemon!
Q. What did the calculator say to the other calculator?
A. "You can count on me!"
Q. Why don't skeletons fight?
A. Because they don't have the guts!
Q. What do you call a football team with pigs?
A. Queens Pork Rangers.
Q. Where did the pencil go for vacation?
A. To Pennsylvania.
Q. When is the best time to buy budgies?
A. When they're going cheap.
Q. What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?
A. I don't know and I don't care.
Q. Who does Frankenstein invite to his party?
A. Anyone he can gobble up!
Q. Imagine you are in a room with no windows or doors. How will you get out?
A. Stop imagining!
Q. What did the bee say to the naughty bee?
A. "Bee-hive yourself!"
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. The butcher was on the other side.
Q. Why did the rope go to the doctor?
A. It had a knot in its stomach.
Q. Why did the dog stay out of the sun?
A. So he wouldn't be a hotdog.
Q. Which day is mostly avoided by fish?
Q. Why did the cow want some cheese?
A. Because it's MOOlicious!
Q. What is the cat's favorite button on the remote?
Q. What jumps higher than a building?
A. Everything, buildings don't jump.
Q. What starts with a P and ends with an E and has thousands of letters?
A. The Post Office!
Q. Why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant?
A. Because he had a big bill.
Q. What flies when it's born, lies when it's alive, and runs when it's dead?
Q. What did the bread say to the man?
A. Nothing, bread can't talk.
Q. Why did the orange get stuck up the on the mountain?
A. Because he ran out of juice.
Q. What is something you will never see again?
A. The past.
Q. Why couldn't they play cards on the ark?
A. Because Noah sat on the deck!
Q. What is a gas station's favorite type of shoes?
Q. Why were the pirates so good at singing?
A. They were working on the high Cs.
Q. How do you make a sausage roll?
A. Push it down the hill!
Q. What's yellow and goes 50 miles per hour?
A. A banana in a washing machine.
Q. How does a bee get to school?
A. On a bzz!
Q. What do you get when you cross a monkey and a pansy?
A. A chimpansy.
Q. How did the teacher knit a suit of armor?
A. She used steel wool!
Q. What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?
A. A woolly jumper!
Q. What are the strongest animals in the ocean?
Q. Why did the turkey cross the road?
A. Because it was the chicken's day off!
Q. What is a snowman's favorite food?
A. Ice Krispy treats.
Q. Why is history the sweetest lesson?
A. Because it is full of dates.
Q. Why did the nose feel sad?
A. Because he always got picked on!
Q. If you're on a plane and one of the engines breaks, how far will the other one take you?
A. All the way to the scene of the crash.
Q. What does a cow do at the theatres?
A. Watch a MOO-vie.
Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
Q. What way are the letter A and noon alike?
A. Both of them are in the middle of the day.
Q. What gets wetter as it dries?
A. A towel!
Q. Why did the skeleton go to the store?
A. To get some spare ribs.
Q. Why don't penguins live in Britain?
A. Because they're scared of Wales!
Q. What do you call a jacket that is on fire?
A. A blazer!
Q. What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A. A milkshake!
Q. What did the cat need when it was having trouble seeing?
A. A PURRscription!
Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.
Q. What does a surprised iceberg say?
A. "Goodness Glacius!"
Q. What did the creek say to the brook?
A. "Stop babbling!"
Q. What is the best way to see a flying saucer?
A. Trip a waiter.
Q. What type of queue do dolls like best?
A. A BBQ.
Q. What is a dog that sneezes?
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
A. Jurassic Pork.
Q. What did the sea say to the shore?
A. Nothing, it just waved.
Q. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A. "Thank you, I will never part with it."
Q. What is grey, has a tail and a trunk?
A. A mouse going on a vacation.
Q. What is smaller then a talking cat?
A. A spelling bee.
Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
Q. What is the best way to catch a squirrel?
A. Act like a nut.
Q. You're riding on a horse and you realize there's a lion chasing you and a giraffe is in front of you. What do you do?
A. Jump off the merry-go-round!
Q. If a man was born in Spain, raised in Russia, grew old in Greece and died in America, what is he?
Q. There are 10 cats in a boat. One cat jumped out of the boat. How many cats were left?
A. None, they were all copycats.
Q. What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
A. Open TOAD sandals.
Q. What's black and white and can climb trees?
A. A panda.
Q. How do you get 6 donkeys into a fire engine?
A. Two in the front, two in the back and two on the top going, "He-haw, he-haw!"
Q. What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A. What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
Q. Why did the cow pack his bags?
A. Because he was MOOving!
Q. Why is a snake lucky?
A. Because you can't pull its leg!
Q. What did the duck say to the clerk?
A. "Put it on my bill."
Q. What does a phone eat?
Q. Why was the elephant afraid of the computer store?
A. Because they sold the world's best mice.
Q. The person who makes it sells it, the person who buys it never uses it, the person who is in it doesn't know it, what is it?
A. A coffin.
Q. Where did the mother monster put her child when she was at work?
A. At day-SCARE!
Q. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A. An investiGATOR!
Q. What is a cow's favorite ice cream?
Q. Where do dogs go when they lose their tail?
A. To the reTAIL store.
Q. What comes down but never goes up?
Q. What can you throw but not catch?
A. A fit!
Q. How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
A. A buccaneer (A buck an ear)
Q. If the red house is in the left and the blue house is on the right, where is the white house ?
A. Washington DC.
Q. What does an eagle use to write with?
A. A bald point pen!
Q. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?
A. Nothing, they just waved!
Q. What do you call a kangaroo that sneezes alot?
A. A kanga-choo.
Q. What do you get when you cross a hammock and a dog?
A. A rocker spaniel.
Q. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?
A. Joseph, Pharoah made a ruler out of him.
Q. Why was the rope late for dinner?
A. It got tied up at the office.
Q. What four letters frighten a thief?
A. O I C U!
Q. Why did the baseball player get arrested?
A. Because he was caught stealing second base!
Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. Because it was the chicken's day off.
Q. Why did the teacher draw on the window?
A. Because he wanted his lesson to be very clear!
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. Because KFC was on the other side.
Q. Why did the girl take a ladder to school?
A. Because she thought it was a high school.
Q. How do you make cool music?
A. Put your CD's in the fridge.
Q. What do you get when you put jeans in the microwave?
A. Four hotpockets.
Q. There is a one story house and everything in it is blue. The walls are blue, the ceiling is blue and the floor is blue. What color are the stairs?
A. There are no stairs in a one story house!
Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice SCREAM and BOOberries!
Q. What is the radius of a pumpkin?
Q. What 4 letters scare a thief?
A. O I C U (Oh...I see you.)
Q. What does not ask questions but must be answered?
A. A doorbell.
Q. What's brown and blue and swings through the jungle?
A. A monkey wearing a denim jacket!
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