Read our huge collection of funny riddles for kids! All our riddles include answers and have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Laugh out loud at these clever and silly riddles sent in by kids visiting our playhouse. Share them with your kids, students and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. We know these riddles will make you laugh out loud! :D
Riddles continue below video…
Q. What is white with black spots and goes, "Oo, oo, oo"?
A. A cow with no lips.
Q. Which country is the slipperiest?
Q. What has a head and a tail but no body?
A. A coin?
Q. What tools do you need for math?
Q. You have a candle, a stove, and a fireplace and a match. Which one would you light first?
A. The match!
Q. Which bet can't be won?
Q. What is a boomerang that doesn't come back?
A. A stick!
Q. A duck, a cat and a cow went out to dinner, who had to pay?
A. The duck. He was the only one with a bill.
Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In a snowbank.
Q. Rail road tracks, look out for cars! How do you spell that without any Rs?
Q. What do you call a bear who forgot his socks?
Q. What did one coffin say to the other coffin?
A. "Is that you coughin'?"
Q. Why was the girl staring at the juice box?
A. Because it said: "Concentrate."
Q. What do you call a cow with no legs?
A. Ground beef.
Q. What did the cross eyed teacher say to the principal?
A. "I can't control my pupils!"
Q. What did the traffic light say to the car?
A. "Don't look. I'm changing!"
Q. What do get when you cross one principal with another principal?
A. I wouldn't do it, principals don't like to be crossed!
Q. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?
A. Joseph, Pharoah made a ruler out of him.
Q. Why didn't the mummy answer the phone?
A. He was all tied up!
Q. How come my uncle does not brush his hair?
A. Because he is bald.
Q. Why did the TV go out with the heater?
A. Because he thought she was hot!
Q. Why did the cow do jumping jacks?
A. Because he wanted a milkshake!
Q. How do you make varnish disappear?
A. Take away the R!
Q. Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired?
A. Because he couldn't keep his calves together!
Q. What is black and white and red all over?
A. An injured penguin.
Q. What money do dogs and cats have?
A. Kitty cash and doggy dollars.
Q. Why are ghosts always hungry?
A. Because the food goes right through them!
Q. What do you call a bell that can do gymnastics?
A. A flexi-bell.
Q. If the red house is in the left and the blue house is on the right, where is the white house ?
A. Washington DC.
Q. Why did the surfer wear a baseball mitt?
A. He wanted to catch a wave.
Q. What kind of bagel can fly?
A. A plain bagel.
Q. Why he did the book want to work with the police?
A. Because he wanted to work under cover.
Q. Why did the apple cuddle the orange?
A. Juice because he wanted a squeeze!
Q. What did the elephant say to her son when he was naughty?
A. "Tusk tusk!"
Q. I'm at the beginning of eternity and the end of time and space. I'm at the beginning of every end and the end of every place. What am I?
A. The letter E!
Q. What does a triceratops sit on?
A. It's tricera-bottom!
Q. What does the baby popcorn call his dad?
Q. Sam, Lula, Mike, and Kayla all live in a house. Mike and Kayla went out to the movies and when they got back Lula was on the floor dead in a pile of broken glass and water. Sam was on the couch sleeping and didn't know what happened. How did Lula die?
A. Sam is a dog and Lula is a fish. Sam pushed over the fish bowl.
Q. What kind of music do stars listen to?
A. The starry blues.
Q. What do you get if you cross some bubble bath and a famous detective?
A. Sherlock Foams.
Q. What do you call a break up between a boy and a girl banana?
A. A banana split.
Q. What sits outside all year long and is Irish?
A. Paddy O'furniture.
Q. Where do pirates like to eat?
Q. What do you say in the evening to a soldier in shining armor?
A. Night, night, Knight.
Q. I am the beginning of end and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation and I surround every place. What am I?
A. The letter E!
Q. What is a math teacher's favourite dessert?
Q. What do you get when you cross a teacher with a tiger?
A. I don't know but you better behave in its class!
Q. Why did the hot dog wear a sweater?
A. Because it was a chili dog!
Q. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A. Because he felt crummy.
Q. Why does a giraffe eat so little?
A. Because they can make a little go a long way.
Q. What do you get when you put jeans in the microwave?
A. Four hotpockets.
Q. How do you throw a tent?
A. You pitch it!
Q. Why is Cinderella a bad football player?
A. Because she has a pumpkin as a coach!
Q. What kind of mail does a superstar vampire get?
A. Fang mail.
Q. What can you catch but not in your hands?
A. A cold!
Q. Why did the millionaire refuse to move to Alaska?
A. He didn't want to freeze his assets.
Q. Where do you send a soldier with a toothache?
A. To the drill sergeant!
Q. Why did the banana factory shut down?
A. Because they chucked out all the bent ones!
Q. What is the most musical part of your body?
A. Your nose, you can blow it and pick it.
Q. What did the cow say to the other cow?
A. "MOOve over!"
Q. How do you start a teddy bear race?
A. Ready, teddy, go!
Q. Why did the nose cross the street?
A. He was getting picked on!
Q. What do you get if you cross a porcupine and a giraffe?
A. A seven metre long toothbrush!
Q. What do you call a cat that eats lemons?
A. A sourpuss.
Q. I am tall when I am young and short when I am old. What am I?
A. A candle.
Q. There is a restaurant that is shaped like an oval. Inside there are waiters, a chef, a hostess, and a janitor. The restaurant opens and later that night the lights go off. Then when the lights turn on everyone except the staff is dead. So, the next day an investigator comes and asks people what they where doing that night. He asked the waiters what they were doing and they said, "Serving customers."
He asked the chef, and the chef said, "He was cooking."
Then he asked the janitor and he said he was sweeping in the corners.
Who killed everyone?
A. The janitor, because there are no corners in a circular restaurant!
Q. What do you give a frog at a hospital?
A. A HOPeration!
Q. What did the ghost say when it sneezed?
A. "Ahh BOO!"
Q. Why didn't the class clown use hair oil the day before the big test?
A. Because he didn't want anything to slip his mind.
Q. What do birds get when they are ill?
Q. Why did the newspaper blush?
A. Because he saw the comic strip.
Q. What do you get when you cross a ball and a cat?
A. A fur ball.
Q. Why was the Egyptian confused?
A. Because someone told him his daddy was a mummy!
Q. Have you heard the joke about the butter?
A. Better not tell you, it might spread!
Q. What has 3 feet but cannot walk?
A. A yardstick!
Q. What has four eyes but can't see?
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
Q. You're stuck in a cement box, all you have is a mirror and a table, how do you get out?
A. You take the mirror, you see what you saw, grab the saw, cut the table in half, one half plus one half equals one whole, you take the hole put it in the wall and walk out.
Q. Why is a snake lucky?
A. Because you can't pull its leg!
Q. Why did the girl bring a ruler to bed with her?
A. She wanted to see how long she slept.
Q. What do you call a smart pig?
Q. What did the big hand on the clock say to the little hand?
A. "Hour you today?"
Q. What do you call a man in a bush?
Q. What do you call a grandfather clock?
A. An old timer!
Q. Why did the fish have no money on him?
A. He left it all at the bank.
Q. What garden has the most vegetables?
A. Flash garden!
Q. What kind of monkey can fly?
A. A hot air BABOON!
Q. What has a neck but can't swallow?
A. A bottle.
Q. Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?
Q. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A. To get to the other slide.
Q. What do you call a frog that parks in a tow away zone?
A. A TOAD away zone.
Q. What is the fastest country in the world?
Q. One cow is talking to another cow and looks away for 10 seconds and the other cow is gone. Where is the other cow?
A. Over the moon!
Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."
Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.
Q. What word of only three syllables contains 26 letters?
Q. What would we do if we found bad plants spoiling our lawn?
A. We'd weed.
Q. How do you make a goldfish age?
A. Take away the g in goldfish.
Q. Why did the tightrope walker visit the bank?
A. He wanted to get his balance!
Q. Why did the monkey cross the road?
A. Because the chicken retired.
Q. The more you take of these, the more you leave behind. What are they?
Q. Where do sheep get their hair cut?
A. At the bah bah shop.
Q. There was a boy and a doctor. The boy was the doctor's son but the doctor was not his dad. Who was the doctor?
A. His mom!
Q. What type of bed can fly?
A. A bed bug.
Q. Why was the ant confused?
A. Because all of his uncles were ants!
Q. What can you call a math teacher?
A. A ruler.
Q. Why couldn't the shipmates play cards?
A. The captain was sitting on the deck!
Q. What did the doctor say to the rocket ship?
A. "Time to get your booster shot!"
Q. What is a crate's favorite sport?
Q. Where do oak trees come from?
Q. What seven letters did the robber say when he saw nothing in the safe?
A. "O I C U R M T!"
Q. How do you get 6 donkeys into a fire engine?
A. Two in the front, two in the back and two on the top going, "He-haw, he-haw!"
Q. What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
A. "You look flushed."
Q. Why did the elephant paint his fingernails red?
A. So he could hide in a bowl of cherries.
Q. Does France have a fourth of July?
A. Of course they do.
Q. What 10 letter word starts with gas?
A. An A-U-T-O-M-O-B-I-L-E.
Q. What is a volcano?
A. A mountain with heartburn!
Q. Why didn't the Joker cross the road?
A. Batman was on the other side.
Q. What is grey, has a tail and a trunk?
A. A mouse going on a vacation.
Q. As I get older, I become shorter. What am I?
A. A pencil!
Q. What goes around the world but stays in one place?
A. A stamp.
Q. Why did the cow pack his bags?
A. Because he was MOOving!
Q. What's the difference between winter and a hurt football player?
A. One is cold out and the other one is out cold.
Q. Does a match box?
A. No, but a tin can!
Q. Why did the kid put his head into the piano?
A. He wanted to play by ear.
Q. Why did the policeman stay in bed?
A. Because he was an undercover cop.
Q. What do you call a square that's been in an accident?
A. A WRECKtangle.
Q. How do you eat an elephant?
A. One bite at a time.
Q. What fish can help you build a house?
A. A hammerhead shark.
Q. What did the tie say to the hat?
A. "You go on a head and I'll hang around here."
Q. What do you call a deer that makes money?
A. A buck!
Q. Why don't they play cards in Africa?
A. There are too many Cheetahs!
Q. What time do you go to the dentist?
A. Tooth hurty!
Q. Which month has 28 days?
A. All of them, of course!
Q. What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
A. "I lava you!"
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
Q. Who does Frankenstein invite to his party?
A. Anyone he can gobble up!
Q. What did the hat say to the scarf?
A. "You can hang around. I'll just go on a head!"
Q. Where do pencils come from?
Q. What is the difference between a cat that got photocopied and a cat that follows you?
A. One is a cat copy, the other is a copy cat.
Q. What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
A. Poultry in motion.
Q. Why did the gum cross the road?
A. It was stuck to the chicken's foot.
Q. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A. "Thank you, I will never part with it."
Q. Why are pirates called pirates?
A. Because they AAARRR!
Q. What's bigger when it's upside down?
A. A 6!
Q. What's a frog's favorite year?
A. Leap year!
Q. Why did the lamb go to the river?
A. To get a BAA-th!
Q. Why did the egg hide?
A. Because she was a little chicken!
Q. What is in fingers, toolboxes and snails?
Q. Why was the dog sitting next to the fire?
A. He was a hotdog!
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