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Funny food jokes for Kids

Food Jokes for Kids

Read our collection of laugh out loud funny food jokes for kids! All our jokes and riddles have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Share them with your kids and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. Food jokes and riddles for kids by kids.

Read our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes! Many of these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these jokes will make you and your kids laugh out loud! :D

Riddles

Q. What did the baker give his wife for their anniversary?
A. Flour.

Q. What do you call a break up between a boy and a girl banana?
A. A banana split.

Q. What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?
A. Pineapple.

Q. Why shouldn't you tell an egg a joke?
A. Because it might crack up!

Q. How do you make a milk shake?
A. Give it a good scare!

Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!

Q. What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
A. "You go on without me, I'll ketchup!"

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!

Q. Why are ghosts always hungry?
A. Because the food goes right through them!

Q. Why did the tomato blush?
A. Because it saw the salad dressing!

Q. What do you call a train full of bubble gum?
A. A chew-chew train.

Q. What vegetables can't you take on a boat?
A. Leeks!

Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
A. Lemon-AID!

Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!

Q. What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A. Ban-ana-na!

Q. Have you heard the joke about the pizza?
A. Never mind, it's too cheesy!

Q. What do vampires never order at a cafe?
A. A STAKE sandwich!

Q. What did the Malteeser want to be when it grew up?
A. A Smartie.

Q. What is green and white when it is up and red when it hits the ground?
A. A watermelon.

Q. What do you call candy corn?
A. Pumpkin poop!

Q. What do you get when a pig and a chicken bump into each other?
A. Ham and eggs!

Q. What do snobby vegetables do when they see people?
A. They turnip (turn up) their noses?

Q. What jam can't you eat?
A. A traffic jam.

Q. What did the bad chicken lay?
A. A deviled egg.

Q. What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
A. An ice burger with chili sauce.

Q. What does the Invisible Man drink at snack time?
A. Evaporated milk.

Q. Why are cooks cruel?
A. Because they whip cream and beat eggs!!

Q. What does the baby popcorn call his dad?
A. Pop!

Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.

Q. What does an injured lemon need?
A. Lemon Aid!

Q. Why are school cafeteria workers cruel?
A. Because they batter fish, beat eggs, and whip cream.

Q. Why did the boy scream when he opened the fridge?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.

Q. Why did the hamburger go to the gym?
A. It wanted better buns.

Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. Because KFC was on the other side.

Q. What did the running ketchup said to the walking ketchup?
A. "Catch up!"

Q. What can you put in a freezer that's hot and will always come out hot?
A. Hot sauce.

Q. Why were the apple and orange alone?
A. Because the banana split!

Q. Where do ghosts buy their food?
A. At the GHOSTery Store.

Riddles continue below video…

Q. What kind of murderer has fibre?
A. A cereal killer.

Q. What did the skeleton say after dinner?
A. "Everything I eat goes right through me!"

Q. What is green, small and round and goes up and down?
A. A pea in a lift.

Q. What did the lucky lollipop say to the unlucky lollipop?
A. "Bye-bye, sucker!"

Q. What's the difference between a train and a teacher?
A. The teacher says, "Spit your gum out" and the train says, "Choo-choo!"

Q. Why did the mushroom have so many friends?
A. Because he was a fungi!

Q. What's white on the inside and green on the outside?
A. A banana dressed up as a cucumber!

Q. Why did the baker go to jail?
A. Because he got caught beating the eggs.

Q. There was a green house. Inside the green house there was a white house. Inside the white house there was a red house. Inside the red house there were lots of babies. What is it?
A. A watermelon!

Q. What did the man say to the butcher at the deli?
A. "I never sausage a place"

Q. Take off my skin. I won't cry but you will. What am I?
A. An onion.

Q. What is long, green and slowly turning red?
A. A cucumber holding its breath!

Q. Have you heard the joke about the butter?
A. Better not tell you, it might spread!

Q. Where did the hamburgers go?
A. To the Meat Ball!

Q. What do you call a pig that gets fired from his job?
A. Canned ham!

Q. What kind of fish goes great with peanut butter?
A. Jellyfish.

Q. What is a table you can eat?
A. A vegetable.

Q. Why did the candy cane cross the road?
A. Because it wanted to get a licking!

Q. What's the difference between a grape and a chicken?
A. They're both purple, except the chicken!

Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.

Q. What vegetable has eyes but can't see?
A. A potato.

Q. What do you call a chimp that likes to eat potato chips?
A. A chip-monk!

Q. What did the fish say to the chip?
A. "We were made for each other."

Q. What did the bread say to the knife?
A. "Don't try to butter me up."

Q. What's white, red and blue at Christmas time?
A. A sad candy cane!

Q. Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
A. Because they put on the salsa.

Q. How did the frozen chicken cross the road?
A. In a shopping bag.

Q. What is a math teacher's favourite dessert?
A. Pi!

Q. What happens to cereal when you add legs?
A. It gives it a little kick!

Q. What is a cow's favorite ice cream?
A. MOOnila!

Q. What did Sergeant Peanut Butter shout to his jelly police officers?
A. "Spread out, men!"

Q. Did you hear what happened down at the fish shop?
A. The fish got battered!

Q. What does a pickle say when he wants to play cards?
A. "Dill me in!"

Q. Why did the chicken join the band?
A. Because he had the drumsticks!

Q. What do you call a pig that does karate?
A. Pork Chop!

Q. What did the taco say to the burrito?
A. "Where you bean?"

Q. What did the policeman have on his sandwich?
A. Some traffic jam!

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cash
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer peanuts!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
John
John who?
Johnny Apple Seed!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Nacho
Nacho who?
I'm nacho momma!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lemon
Lemon who?
Lemon know when you want me to say apple again.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad we are out of school?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Peas
Peas who?
Peas let me in now!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lettuce
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Felix
Felix who?
Felix my lolly, I'll whack him.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Berry
Berry who?
Berry nice too meet you can. Can I come in now?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Banana split!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I like you.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ketchup
Ketchup who?
Ketchup and I'll tell you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Soup
Soup who?
Superman!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ramon
Ramon who?
Ramon noodle soup.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wiener.
Wiener. who?
Wiener you going to get here?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
I8D
I8D who?
I8D whole cake!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ice Cream
Ice Cream who?
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Figs.
Figs. who?
Figs the doorbell, it's broken!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cereal
Cereal who?
Cereal pleasure to meet you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cheese
Cheese who?
Cheese a cute girl!

Jokes

Customer: There is a fly in my soup.
Waitress: Don't worry the spider in your bread will get it.
 

Once an old man and woman went to a restaurant and ordered two sandwiches. The waiter brought the sandwiches and the old man started to eat but the women was only staring at the food. The waiter noticed this and went to see what the problem was. The old woman said nothing and just stared at him but the old man interrupted and said, "The sandwich is delicious, but she can't eat because I am using her teeth."
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Shelly: Our teacher is a peach.
Kelly: You mean she is really nice?
Shelly: No, she has a heart of stone.
 

A lady came to a shop and got 14 scoops of ice cream with nuts. The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?"
The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
 

There was a family of tomatoes, the father tomato, the mother tomato and the baby tomato. They were walking down the road one day and baby tomato kept lagging behind. So finally the father tomato went back and stepped on him and said, "Catch up!"
 

A man went to a restaurant and ordered soup. When the waitress came to give the soup to the man, he said, "Excuse me, I saw your thumb in my soup."
The waitress said, "Oh, it's okay. It wasn't hot."
 

There was once a cookie saying, "I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie."
A lady came along and told him to be quiet. She poked him in the middle. Then the cookie looked at his stomach and said, "I'm a donut, I'm a donut, I'm a donut."
 

My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it!
Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

Two cookies are baking in an oven. One cookie says to the other, "Man, is it me, or is it getting kinda hot in here?"
The other cookie replies, "Oh my goodness! A talking cookie!!"
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Me: I have a pizza joke!
Friend: What is it?
Me: Never mind! It's too cheesy!
 

A mushroom walks into a bar and the waiter says, "You look like a fungi!"
 

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it?
Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Whenever I want to start eating healthy a chocolate bar looks at me and snickers.
 

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