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Funny food jokes for Kids

Food Jokes for Kids

Read our collection of laugh out loud funny food jokes for kids! All our jokes and riddles have been screened to ensure they are appropriate for children. Share them with your kids and friends. Did you know that riddles promote creative thinking in children? Why not memorize a few and share them at home, on the go or in the classroom. Food jokes and riddles for kids by kids.

Read our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes! Many of these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these jokes will make you and your kids laugh out loud! :D

Riddles

Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.

Q. What is long, green and slowly turning red?
A. A cucumber holding its breath!

Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.

Q. What is a cow's favorite ice cream?
A. MOOnila!

Q. What does the Invisible Man drink at snack time?
A. Evaporated milk.

Q. What two countries should the chef use when he's making Christmas dinner?
A. Turkey and Greece.

Q. Paul is six feet tall. He is an assistant in a butcher shop. He wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
A. Meat.

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice SCREAM and BOOberries!

Q. What did the bully have for lunch?
A. He had a knuckle sandwich!

Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween?
A. A Hallo-weenie!

Q. Why did the banana wear sunscreen?
A. He didn't want to peel!

Q. What do you get when two skeletons dance in a biscuit tin?
A. Noise!

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. I scream.

Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A. Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?!

Q. What jam can't you eat?
A. A traffic jam.

Q. Did you hear what happened down at the fish shop?
A. The fish got battered!

Q. Why did the bacon laugh?
A. Because the egg cracked a yoke.

Q. Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?
A. Because its got heart.

Q. What do you call a train full of toffee?
A. A chew-chew train!

Q. What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A. I don't know, a Hershey BAAH?!

Q. Where do ghosts buy their food?
A. At the GHOSTery Store.

Q. Why did the rancher name his ranch "Peanut Butter"?
A. It was a great spread.

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!

Q. What vegetables can't you take on a boat?
A. Leeks!

Q. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A. Because he felt crummy.

Q. What did the Malteeser want to be when it grew up?
A. A Smartie.

Q. What cheese is not yours?
A. Nacho Cheese.

Q. What do you call a worried hot dog?
A. A frank fretter.

Q. What do you call candy corn?
A. Pumpkin poop!

Q. What do race car driver's eat?
A. Fast food!

Q. What did the bread say to the man?
A. Nothing, bread can't talk.

Q. What is a table you can eat?
A. A vegetable.

Q. Take off my skin. I won't cry but you will. What am I?
A. An onion.

Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"

Q. What can you put in a freezer that's hot and will always come out hot?
A. Hot sauce.

Q. Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
A. Because they put on the salsa.

Q. Have you heard the joke about the pizza?
A. Never mind, it's too cheesy!

Q. Why are cooks cruel?
A. Because they whip cream and beat eggs!!

Riddles continue below video…

Q. Why did the baker go to jail?
A. Because he got caught beating the eggs.

Q. What does an orange do when it takes a test?
A. It concentrates!

Q. Why did the bread cross the road?
A. To BUTTER the other side!

Q. What do you get when a pig and a chicken bump into each other?
A. Ham and eggs!

Q. What do you get when you cross a chicken and a centipede?
A. Drumsticks for everyone!

Q. There was a green house. Inside the green house there was a white house. Inside the white house there was a red house. Inside the red house there were lots of babies. What is it?
A. A watermelon!

Q. What's white on the inside and green on the outside?
A. A banana dressed up as a cucumber!

Q. What do vampires never order at a cafe?
A. A STAKE sandwich!

Q. What is a buckaneer?
A. Expensive corn!

Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."

Q. What do ghosts eat for dinner?
A. SPOOKgetti!

Q. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
A. "Where's popcorn?!"

Q. Why do people by aggressive fruit?
A. So they can make fruit punch!

Q. What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?
A. Pineapple.

Q. What kind of candy won't a ghost touch?
A. Life Savers.

Q. What's yellow and goes 50 miles per hour?
A. A banana in a washing machine.

Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. Because KFC was on the other side.

Q. What did the Easter Bunny say to the carrot?
A. "It's been nice gnawing you!"

Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!

Q. Why did the mushroom have so many friends?
A. Because he was a fungi!

Q. What does a pickle say when he wants to play cards?
A. "Dill me in!"

Q. What did the frog order at the burger place?
A. French flies and a diet croak.

Q. What can't you eat at dinner?
A. Breakfast and lunch!

Q. What is green and white when it is up and red when it hits the ground?
A. A watermelon.

Q. Why did the boy scream when he opened the fridge?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.

Q. How do you get fat free milk?
A. From a skinny cow!

Q. What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him?
A. Nothing, he just let out a little wine.

Q. What kind of doctor never works but is very popular around the world?
A. Dr. Pepper (the soda).

Q. What would happen if pigs could fly?
A. Bacon would go up!

Q. What happens to cereal when you add legs?
A. It gives it a little kick!

Q. How do you make a sausage roll?
A. Push it down the hill!

Q. What do you call a break up between a boy and a girl banana?
A. A banana split.

Q. How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A. Grapes are purple.

Q. Where do you learn to make ice cream?
A. At Sundae School!

Q. Why did the cookie cry?
A. Because his mother was a wafer too long!

Q. What do you call a potato that was crushed?
A. Squash.

Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cash
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer peanuts!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
John
John who?
Johnny Apple Seed!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Nacho
Nacho who?
I'm nacho momma!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lemon
Lemon who?
Lemon know when you want me to say apple again.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad we are out of school?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Peas
Peas who?
Peas let me in now!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lettuce
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Felix
Felix who?
Felix my lolly, I'll whack him.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Berry
Berry who?
Berry nice too meet you can. Can I come in now?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Banana split!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I like you.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ketchup
Ketchup who?
Ketchup and I'll tell you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Soup
Soup who?
Superman!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ramon
Ramon who?
Ramon noodle soup.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wiener.
Wiener. who?
Wiener you going to get here?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
I8D
I8D who?
I8D whole cake!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ice Cream
Ice Cream who?
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Figs.
Figs. who?
Figs the doorbell, it's broken!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cereal
Cereal who?
Cereal pleasure to meet you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cheese
Cheese who?
Cheese a cute girl!

Jokes

Customer: There is a fly in my soup.
Waitress: Don't worry the spider in your bread will get it.
 

Once an old man and woman went to a restaurant and ordered two sandwiches. The waiter brought the sandwiches and the old man started to eat but the women was only staring at the food. The waiter noticed this and went to see what the problem was. The old woman said nothing and just stared at him but the old man interrupted and said, "The sandwich is delicious, but she can't eat because I am using her teeth."
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Shelly: Our teacher is a peach.
Kelly: You mean she is really nice?
Shelly: No, she has a heart of stone.
 

A lady came to a shop and got 14 scoops of ice cream with nuts. The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?"
The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
 

There was a family of tomatoes, the father tomato, the mother tomato and the baby tomato. They were walking down the road one day and baby tomato kept lagging behind. So finally the father tomato went back and stepped on him and said, "Catch up!"
 

A man went to a restaurant and ordered soup. When the waitress came to give the soup to the man, he said, "Excuse me, I saw your thumb in my soup."
The waitress said, "Oh, it's okay. It wasn't hot."
 

There was once a cookie saying, "I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie."
A lady came along and told him to be quiet. She poked him in the middle. Then the cookie looked at his stomach and said, "I'm a donut, I'm a donut, I'm a donut."
 

My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it!
Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

Two cookies are baking in an oven. One cookie says to the other, "Man, is it me, or is it getting kinda hot in here?"
The other cookie replies, "Oh my goodness! A talking cookie!!"
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Me: I have a pizza joke!
Friend: What is it?
Me: Never mind! It's too cheesy!
 

A mushroom walks into a bar and the waiter says, "You look like a fungi!"
 

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it?
Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Whenever I want to start eating healthy a chocolate bar looks at me and snickers.
 

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