Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Valentine Jokes

We've got lots of funny Valentine jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
A. Any old girl he can dig up.

Q. Why did the rooster cross the road?
A. He wanted to impress the chicks!

Q. Are you a triangle?
A. 'Cause you sure are acute! ;)

Q. What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?
A. Hog and kisses!

Q. Why do Valentine's have hearts on them?
A. Because brains would be pretty gross!

Q. What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
A. "I lava you!"

Q. What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A. "I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand."

Q. Why did the frog cross the road?
A. Because he wanted to show his girlfriend he had guts.

Q. How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
A. It gave her a ring!

Q. What did one oar say to the other?
A. "Can I interest you in a little row-mance?"

Q. What did the bat say to his girlfriend?
A. You're fun to hang around with.

Q. What do bunnies do when they get married?
A. Go on a bunnymoon!

Q. What did one raspberry say to the other on Valentine's Day?
A. "I love you berry much."

Q. What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
A. Ouchy, mama!

Q. Why did the rooster get a tattoo?
A. He wanted to impress the chicks!

Q. Why are angel marriages so good?
A. Because they live harp-ily ever after.

Q. What did the snake say to his girlfriend on Valentine's Day?
A. "Give me a little hiss."

Q. What flower gives the most kisses on Valentines Day?
A. Tulips.

Q. Why did the cats get married?
A. They were PURR-fect for each other!

Q. What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
A. "I find you very attractive."

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Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Olive
Olive who?
Olive you. (I love you)

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Luvs
Luvs who?
Luvs you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cheese
Cheese who?
Cheese a cute girl

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Pooch
Pooch who?
Pooch your arms around me, honey!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Howard
Howard who?
Howard you like a big kiss?


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