Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Insect Jokes

We've got lots of funny Insect jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. Homeless.

Q. What do you call an an ant sticking out of the ground?
A. A plANT!

Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.

Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

Q. What insect is a coward?
A. A flea!

Q. What insect is an arithmetic insect?
A. A mosquito! They add to misery, subtract from pleasure, divide the attention and multiply quickly!

Q. What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A. Finding half a worm in your apple.

Q. What do you call a snail on a ship?
A. A snailor.

Q. Why didn't the butterfly go to the dance?
A. Because it was a moth ball!

Q. Who is the kind of the insects?
A. The Monarch!

Q. Why don't fleas get cold?
A. They are always in fur coats!

Q. What do you call a bee's back?
A. It's bee-hind!

Q. What did one cool bee say to the other?
A. "Buzz off, dude!"

Q. Why did the kid run to school?
A. Because he was chased by the spelling bee.

Q. What did the Pink Panther say after he stepped on the ant?
A. "Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant!"

Q. What kind of animals do clocks have?
A. Ticks.

Q. How did the centipede run up a million-dollar doctor bill?
A. He sprained his ankle.

Q. Why did the bee get married?
A. Because she found her honey.

Q. How did the man build up his flea collar business?
A. He started from scratch.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Bee
Bee who?
Bee happy!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Monarch
Monarch who?
Monarch butterfly!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Jokes

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 


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