Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Insect Jokes

We've got lots of funny Insect jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. How do bees get to school?
A. By school BUZZ!

Q. What is smaller then a talking cat?
A. A spelling bee.

Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.

Q. Why are bees so sticky?
A. They use honey combs!

Q. What did the bee say when he returned to the hive?
A. "Honey, I'm home!"

Q. Why did the bee feel cold?
A. Because it is in the middle of A and C.

Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.

Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.

Q. What happened to the bed bugs who fell in love?
A. They got married in the spring.

Q. What do you call two spiders who just got married?
A. Newlyweb!

Q. What do you get when you cross a chicken and a centipede?
A. Drumsticks for everyone!

Q. What's better than a talking dog?
A. A spelling bee!

Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.

Q. How does a bee get to school?
A. On a bzz!

Q. What did the Pink Panther say after he stepped on the ant?
A. "Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant!"

Q. What's an insect's favorite sport?
A. Cricket.

Q. Think of the person who lives in disguise, who deals in secrets and tells nothing but lies.
Next tell me what's always last to mend the middle of middle and end of the end.
And finally give me the sound often heard during the search for a hard to find word.
Now string them all together and answer me this:
What creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
A. A spider.

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. A slug.

Q. What do you get when you cross a parrot and a caterpillar?
A. A walkie talkie.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Larva
Larva who?
I larva you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Termite
Termite who?
Termite's the night!

Jokes

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 


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