Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Insect Jokes

We've got lots of funny Insect jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

Q. What is smaller then a talking cat?
A. A spelling bee.

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. A slug.

Q. Which pillar is not used in a building?
A. A caterpillar.

Q. What do you call an an ant sticking out of the ground?
A. A plANT!

Q. How can you tell which end is the head of a worm?
A. Tickle the middle and see where it laughs!

Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!

Q. What did the firefly say to the other firefly?
A. "You glow, girl!"

Q. Think of the person who lives in disguise, who deals in secrets and tells nothing but lies.
Next tell me what's always last to mend the middle of middle and end of the end.
And finally give me the sound often heard during the search for a hard to find word.
Now string them all together and answer me this:
What creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
A. A spider.

Q. How does a bee get to school?
A. On a bzz!

Q. What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
A. Bacon and legs!

Q. Why was the ant confused?
A. Because all of his uncles were ants!

Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.

Q. What kind of animals do clocks have?
A. Ticks.

Q. What do you get if you throw butter?
A. A butterfly!

Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.

Q. Why did the bee hum?
A. It forgot the words!

Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.

Q. What's the biggest type of moth?
A. A mammoth.

Q. Why did the spider take a laptop to the beach?
A. So it could surf the web.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Termite
Termite who?
Termite's the night!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Larva
Larva who?
I larva you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Jokes

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
 

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 


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