Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Insect Jokes

We've got lots of funny Insect jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What kind of bug goes Zzub Zzub?
A. A bumble bee flying backward!

Q. Where do bees go after they are married?
A. On their HONEY-moon!

Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.

Q. What do you call a 100-year-old ant?
A. ANT-ique.

Q. What did the Pink Panther say after he stepped on the ant?
A. "Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant!"

Q. Why did the bee feel cold?
A. Because it is in the middle of A and C.

Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.

Q. What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A. Finding half a worm in your apple.

Q. What kind of place should you never take a dog?
A. To the Flea Market.

Q. What is smaller then a talking cat?
A. A spelling bee.

Q. Why did the bee hum?
A. It forgot the words!

Q. What insect has great baseball skills?
A. A pop fly!

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. A slug.

Q. What do you call an an ant sticking out of the ground?
A. A plANT!

Q. How did the centipede run up a million-dollar doctor bill?
A. He sprained his ankle.

Q. What happened to the bed bugs who fell in love?
A. They got married in the spring.

Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.

Q. Why don't fleas get cold?
A. They are always in fur coats!

Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!

Q. What's better than a talking dog?
A. A spelling bee!

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Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Termite
Termite who?
Termite's the night!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Larva
Larva who?
I larva you!

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Jokes

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 


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