Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Insect Jokes

We've got lots of funny Insect jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What do you call a snail on a ship?
A. A snailor.

Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.

Q. Think of the person who lives in disguise, who deals in secrets and tells nothing but lies.
Next tell me what's always last to mend the middle of middle and end of the end.
And finally give me the sound often heard during the search for a hard to find word.
Now string them all together and answer me this:
What creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
A. A spider.

Q. What kind of animals do clocks have?
A. Ticks.

Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.

Q. Why was the ant confused?
A. Because all of his uncles were ants!

Q. What's better than a talking dog?
A. A spelling bee!

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. Homeless.

Q. What do you get when you eat caterpillars?
A. Butterflies in your stomach!

Q. What happened to the bed bugs who fell in love?
A. They got married in the spring.

Q. What do you call an an ant sticking out of the ground?
A. A plANT!

Q. How did the man build up his flea collar business?
A. He started from scratch.

Q. How can you tell which end is the head of a worm?
A. Tickle the middle and see where it laughs!

Q. Who is the kind of the insects?
A. The Monarch!

Q. What insect has great baseball skills?
A. A pop fly!

Q. What did the firefly say to the other firefly?
A. "You glow, girl!"

Q. Why did the bee feel cold?
A. Because it is in the middle of A and C.

Q. Why did the bee hum?
A. It forgot the words!

Q. What's the biggest type of moth?
A. A mammoth.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Larva
Larva who?
I larva you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Monarch
Monarch who?
Monarch butterfly!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Jokes

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?" "Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup? Waiter: Saying grace.
 


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