Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Food Jokes

We've got lots of funny Food jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What is a cow's favorite ice cream?
A. MOOnila!

Q. There was a green house. Inside the green house there was a white house. Inside the white house there was a red house. Inside the red house there were lots of babies. What is it?
A. A watermelon!

Q. Why did the bread cross the road?
A. To BUTTER the other side!

Q. Why do mushrooms like to tell jokes?
A. Because they're a fungi!

Q. What do you call candy corn?
A. Pumpkin poop!

Q. What do you call a potato that was crushed?
A. Squash.

Q. Why are cooks cruel?
A. Because they whip cream and beat eggs!!

Q. What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A. I don't know, a Hershey BAAH?!

Q. What did Sergeant Peanut Butter shout to his jelly police officers?
A. "Spread out, men!"

Q. What did the dressing say to the refrigerator?
A. "Shut the door I am dressing!"

Q. What did the ghost put on his bagel?
A. SCREAM cheese!

Q. Why were the apple and orange alone?
A. Because the banana split!

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!

Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
A. Lemon-AID!

Q. What do you call a pig that gets fired from his job?
A. Canned ham!

Q. What kind of bagel can fly?
A. A plain bagel.

Q. Have you heard the joke about the pizza?
A. Never mind, it's too cheesy!

Q. What did the taco say to the burrito?
A. "Where you bean?"

Q. How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A. Grapes are purple.

Q. Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
A. Because they put on the salsa.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Nacho
Nacho who?
I'm nacho momma!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Soup
Soup who?
Superman!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I like you.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana!

Jokes

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?" The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here." The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
 

A mushroom walks into a bar and the waiter says, "You look like a fungi!"
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it! Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

Customer: There is a fly in my soup. Waitress: Don't worry the spider in your bread will get it.
 

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it? Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

A man went to a restaurant and ordered soup. When the waitress came to give the soup to the man, he said, "Excuse me, I saw your thumb in my soup." The waitress said, "Oh, it's okay. It wasn't hot."
 

There was a family of tomatoes, the father tomato, the mother tomato and the baby tomato. They were walking down the road one day and baby tomato kept lagging behind. So finally the father tomato went back and stepped on him and said, "Catch up!"
 

There was once a cookie saying, "I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie, I'm a cookie." A lady came along and told him to be quiet. She poked him in the middle. Then the cookie looked at his stomach and said, "I'm a donut, I'm a donut, I'm a donut."
 


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