Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Food Jokes

We've got lots of funny Food jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What did the running ketchup said to the walking ketchup?
A. "Catch up!"

Q. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
A. "Where's popcorn?!"

Q. Did you hear what happened down at the fish shop?
A. The fish got battered!

Q. What has ears but can't hear?
A. A corn field!

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. I scream.

Q. Paul is six feet tall. He is an assistant in a butcher shop. He wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
A. Meat.

Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween?
A. A Hallo-weenie!

Q. What do you call a pig that does karate?
A. Pork Chop!

Q. Why did the banana factory shut down?
A. Because they chucked out all the bent ones!

Q. What two candies are the smartest?
A. Smarties and Nerds.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite fruit?
A. BOOberries.

Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.

Q. What did the Easter Bunny say to the carrot?
A. "It's been nice gnawing you!"

Q. Why did the cow do jumping jacks?
A. Because he wanted a milkshake!

Q. What is yellow on the outside and gray on the inside?
A. An elephant that's dressed up in a banana skin.

Q. What do you call a pig that gets fired from his job?
A. Canned ham!

Q. What did the ghosts eat for dinner?
A. Spoke!

Q. What do you call a mummy eating in bed?
A. A crummy mummy.

Q. What does the baby popcorn call his dad?
A. Pop!

Q. What do vampires never order at a cafe?
A. A STAKE sandwich!

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Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Soup
Soup who?
Superman!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Peas
Peas who?
Peas let me in now!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wiener.
Wiener. who?
Wiener you going to get here?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad we are out of school?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
John
John who?
Johnny Apple Seed!

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Jokes

Customer: There is a fly in my soup. Waitress: Don't worry the spider in your bread will get it.
 

Me: I have a pizza joke! Friend: What is it? Me: Never mind! It's too cheesy!
 

Shelly: Our teacher is a peach. Kelly: You mean she is really nice? Shelly: No, she has a heart of stone.
 

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it? Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it! Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

A lady came to a shop and got 14 scoops of ice cream with nuts. The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?" The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
 

There was a family of tomatoes, the father tomato, the mother tomato and the baby tomato. They were walking down the road one day and baby tomato kept lagging behind. So finally the father tomato went back and stepped on him and said, "Catch up!"
 

A mushroom walks into a bar and the waiter says, "You look like a fungi!"
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 


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