Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Food Jokes

We've got lots of funny Food jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What has ears but can't hear?
A. A corn field!

Q. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A. Because he felt crummy.

Q. What is a buckaneer?
A. Expensive corn!

Q. What did the fish say to the chip?
A. "We were made for each other."

Q. What did the bad chicken lay?
A. A deviled egg.

Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"

Q. What did the happy slice of cheese say to the sad slice of cheese?
A. "Aw, it will be okay! Everything is GOUDA!"

Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."

Q. What did the policeman have on his sandwich?
A. Some traffic jam!

Q. How did Burger King propose to his girlfriend?
A. With an onion ring.

Q. Have you heard the joke about the pizza?
A. Never mind, it's too cheesy!

Q. Why did the tomato blush?
A. Because it saw the salad dressing!

Q. Where do you learn to make ice cream?
A. At Sundae School!

Q. What do you get when two skeletons dance in a biscuit tin?
A. Noise!

Q. Why do mushrooms like to tell jokes?
A. Because they're a fungi!

Q. What's white, red and blue at Christmas time?
A. A sad candy cane!

Q. What is a witch's favourite food?
A. Goulash.

Q. What vegetables can't you take on a boat?
A. Leeks!

Q. What kind of doctor never works but is very popular around the world?
A. Dr. Pepper (the soda).

Q. What is a math teacher's favourite dessert?
A. Pi!

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
John
John who?
Johnny Apple Seed!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cereal
Cereal who?
Cereal pleasure to meet you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Soup
Soup who?
Superman!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I like you.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lemon
Lemon who?
Lemon know when you want me to say apple again.

Jokes

Two cookies are baking in an oven. One cookie says to the other, "Man, is it me, or is it getting kinda hot in here?" The other cookie replies, "Oh my goodness! A talking cookie!!"
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it! Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

A man went to a restaurant and ordered soup. When the waitress came to give the soup to the man, he said, "Excuse me, I saw your thumb in my soup." The waitress said, "Oh, it's okay. It wasn't hot."
 

Whenever I want to start eating healthy a chocolate bar looks at me and snickers.
 

A mushroom walks into a bar and the waiter says, "You look like a fungi!"
 

A lady came to a shop and got 14 scoops of ice cream with nuts. The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?" The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
 

There was a family of tomatoes, the father tomato, the mother tomato and the baby tomato. They were walking down the road one day and baby tomato kept lagging behind. So finally the father tomato went back and stepped on him and said, "Catch up!"
 

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it? Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

Me: I have a pizza joke! Friend: What is it? Me: Never mind! It's too cheesy!
 


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