Squigly Squigly's Jokes and Riddles

Elephant Jokes

We've got lots of funny Elephant jokes for you! These riddles, knock, knock jokes and jokes have been submitted by kids from all over the world. We know they will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
A. Lost.

Q. What's big and grey with horns?
A. An elephant marching band!

Q. Why was the elephant afraid of the computer store?
A. Because they sold the world's best mice.

Q. Why doesn't the elephant use the computer?
A. Because it is afraid of the mouse!

Q. Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly?
A. Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an aspirin!

Q. What do a tree and an elephant have in common?
A. A trunk.

Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A. A submarine with a built-in snorkel.

Q. What time is it when an elephant sits in a chair?
A. Time to buy a new chair!

Q. There were two elephants under one umbrella, why didn't they get wet?
A. It wasn't raining.

Q. What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant?
A. Swimming trunks!

Q. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and put the elephant in and then close the door.

Q. How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and take out the elephant and put the giraffe in, then close the door.

Q. The animals were having a meeting in the jungle. Who didn't come?
A. The giraffe, it was in the refrigerator.

Q. A man was hiking in the jungle. He came to a river. In the river lived alligators. How did the man cross the river?
A. He swam across, the alligators were at the meeting.

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. Because they would look funny with a suitcase.

Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.

Q. What's big, grey and has red spots?
A. An elephant with chicken pox!

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. They'd look pretty stupid with glove compartments.

Q. How do pachyderms hear?
A. It doesn't matter - it's ear elephant (irrelevant).

Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a parrot?
A. An animal that tells you everything it remembers!

Q. Why couldn't the two elephants go swimming together?
A. Because they only had one pair of trunks!

Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses?
A. Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.

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Jokes

Peter: Mother, why is a snail stronger than an elephant? Mother: I don't know. Peter: Because a snail can carry its own home, but an elephant can only carry its own trunk.
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Policeman: One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle. Zoo keeper: Nonsense, none of my elephants know how to ride a bicycle.
 

Down in the south where coconuts grow, an elephant stepped on a mosquito's toe. The mosquito jumped up with tears in his eyes and said, "Excuse me but you're not my size."
 

An elephant asked an ant, "Please hide me." So the ant replied, "Hide behind me."
 

A guy and his elephant are driving and get pulled over. The policeman says, "You need to take the elephant to the zoo." So the guy took his elephant to the zoo. The next day, the same policeman pulls over the same guy and elephant. The policeman says, "I told you to take the elephant to the zoo." The guy says, "I did yesterday, today we are going to a baseball game."
 


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