Why can't Cinderella play soccer?
She runs away from the ball!
Brianna, age 11, USA
What do you call a blind dinosaur?
Doyouthinkhesarus?
Lene, age 12, England
What dog can jump higher than a building?
Any dog, because buildings can't jump.
Lene, age 12, England
Why do golfers wear two layers of clothes to the golf course?
Just in case they get a hole-in-one!
Anonymous, age 11, USA
Ronen, age 8
Lauren, age 9, USA
Where did the mother monster put her child when she was at work?
At day-SCARE!
Zaynab, age 9, USA
What do you get when you cross a cat with a lemon?
A sourpuss!
Sophie, age 9, America
A father and son get into a car accident. The dad dies and the son gets rushed to the hospital. The surgeon steps out of the room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son." Who is the surgeon? The surgeon is the boy's mother.
Nicole, age 13, USA
What do you get when you cross a skeleton with a genie?
A wish bone!
Joel, age 13, Australia
Why doesn't a bald man need any keys?
Because he doesn't have any locks!
Katelyn, age 13, Australia
Why does your sister jump up and down before taking her medicine?
Because the label says: Shake well before using!
Ana, age 11, USA
Why did the elephant cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off!
Jenna, age 9, USA
Kyleigh, age 9, USA
Owen, age 9, USA
Josh, age 11, New Zealand
I have two coins in my pocket and they equal 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the coins in my pocket?
A nickel and a dime, I said only one of them is not a nickel.
Sarah, age 12, USA
How do u make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it!
Candy, age 12, USA
Why did the skeleton cross the street by himself?
Because he had no BODY to go with him.
Baneen, age 9, USA
Why did the cow pack his bags?
Because he was MOOving!
Anonymous
What kind of facial hair do cows have?
A MOOstache!
B, age 10, USA
Cindt, age 9, USA
What gate can't you enter?
Colgate!
Arshpari, age 10, India
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese!
Michelle, age 10, USA
Mia, age 9, USA
Why was the baker rich?
He had a lot of dough!
No-name, USA
What room has no windows or doors?
A mushroom.
Ellie, age 8, Ireland
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye deer!
Elli, age 10, England
Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken's foot!
Colleen, age 24, Ireland
Anonymous, age 10, USA
What is Barbie's favorite state?
KENtucky!
Melanie, age 12, USA
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I lava you!
What did he say when they broke up?
I heat you!
What did they name their daughter?
MAGMAlena!
Melanie, age 12, USA
Andrew died in the Bahamas and Irene died in the ocean.
The family of Irene were happy she died at sea. Why ?
Andrew and Irene were both tropical super-storms!
Jalen, age 10, USA
What did the ocean say to the pirate?
Nothing, it just waved!
Mya, age 10, USA
Why was the woman so happy she finished her jigsaw puzzle in six months?
The box said 2-4 years!
Jacob, age 10, USA
What stays in a corner but travels around the world?
A stamp!
Rithika, age 10, USA
What gets broken when you don't hold it?
Secret.
Anonymous
Which restaurants are good at math?
Take-aways!
Heather, age 8, England
What has a neck but no head?
A bass.
Caleb, age 9, USA
What has 6 eyes but cannot see
Three blind mice.
Lindsay, age 8, USA
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
A'Lanni, age 9, USA
Why did the pencil say ouch?
Because he broke his lead.
Faith, age 10, USA
What has a head and a tale but no body?
A coin!
Cole, age 12, USA
Katlen, age 11
What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
Sir!
Liam, age 11, Australia
Why did the nose cross the street?
He was getting picked on!
Benny, age 10, USA
Did you hear about the kidnapping?
He finally woke up!
Anonymous
How do you make seven an even number?
Take away the S!
Chantelle, age 12, England
What kind of shoes can you make out of banana peels?
Slippers!
Jasmine, age 10, USA
What goes up but doesn't go down?
Your age!
Sagal, age 11, USA
Zachary, age 9, USA
What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered?
Mount Everest.
Rylee, age 9, USA
What does a phone eat?
Minutes.
Inaisah, age 6, USA
There were 2 boys, they were born to the same mother, born on the same day and in the same year. They are NOT twins.
How is this possible?
They're triplets!
Ashley, age 12, Australia
Why is it against the law for a man living in Victoria to be buried in New South Wales?
Because he's still alive!
Ashley, age 12, Australia
A man was killed in a car while driving. The police went to investigate. They found all the doors were locked and all the windows were up.
How did the murderer do it?
The driver was driving a convertible and the roof was down.
Ashley, age 12, Australia
What do you call a bad event with cats?
CATastrophe!
Kingyoyo, age 11, Australia
Once upon a time there lived a man and he had only one sense. What was it?
It was Nonsense!
Sharan, age 9, India
Sophie's mother had 2 sons and 1 daughter. The sons' names were George and John. What was the daughter's name?
Sophie.
Sharan, age 9, India
Why shouldn't you go outside if it's raining cats and dogs?
Because you might step in a poodle!
Miranda & Tabby, age 9, Canada
What is as light as a feather but not even the strongest man in the world can hold it for more than a few minutes?
Air!
Ellie, age 10, United Kingdom
Meme, age 10, USA
How do you get Pikachu on the bus?
You Pokemon!
Faith, age 7, USA
Why don't you do math in the forest?
3+5 you get ate!
Aby, age 12
What is a bunny's favorite music?
Hip hop!
Cheyenne, age 7, USA
What comes once in a year and twice in a week but never in a month?
The letter E.
Jannita, age 12, USA
What did the buffalo say to her son when he went to college?
Bye-son!
Bobby, age 25
What has a forest with no trees, lakes without water, roads with no cars and deserts with no sand?
A map!
Alex , age 9, UK
Why were the apple and orange alone?
Because the banana split!
Nandini, age 9, USA
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the shell station.
Linzey, age 10, USA
Why did the kid throw the clock out the window?
Because she wanted to see time fly.
Sarah, age 9, America
What did the cat say about the shape?
It was PURRfect!
Valentime, age 10, USA
Two cats are having a race in the English Channel. One is English and one is French. The English cat is named 1, 2, 3, and the French cat is named Un, Deux, Trois. Which cat won the race?
The English one because Un, Deux, Trois, cat, sank!
Ellis, age 12, Canada
It is not our enemy, yet we still beat it. What is it?
A drum.
Saumya, age 9, India
Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
Because she wanted to see the butterfly.
Alexa, age 7, USA
What is a zombie's least favorite room in the house?
The living room!
Susie, age 9, USA
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts do to it.
Mairead, age 9, USA
Arlene, age 10, USA
What's a cat's favorite subject in school?
MEWsic!
Amy, age 11, USA
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
Sophie , age 10, Australia
What word do all Ivy League graduates spell incorrectly?
Incorrectly!
Natalie, age 11, USA
A man was walking through the forest like he does every day. "There is not a single spot that does not have trees," he says. But, when he comes to a clearing that he has walked through 56 times, the trees are knocked over. There is a shelter. Inside the shelter are 2 dead people. Who are the dead people, what is the shelter, and why are the trees knocked over?
The two dead people are the pilot, and the co-pilot. The shelter is the plane and there was a plane crash.
Natalie, age 11, USA
Why didn't the sun go to college?
Because he already had a thousand degrees!
Starboii, age 11, Trinidad
Why does a small guy take the elevator on rainy days but the stairs on nice days?
Because he needs his umbrella to reach the elevator buttons!
Colin, age 8, USA
What is more powerful than God,
more evil than the devil, the poor have it and the rich need it but if you eat it you will die?
Nothing!
Brianna, age 11, USA
Have you heard the joke about the butter?
I better not tell you, because it might spread!
Dianne, age 59, Australia
Why did Tigger look in the toilet?
To find Pooh!
Avery, age 11, USA
Tarun, age 9, Singapore
Why was the pencil crying?
Because he was POINTLESS!
Evelyn, age 11, USA
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
Because she was a chicken!
Evelin, age 11, USA
How to you wake Lady GAGA?
Poke her face!
Breauna, age 11, USA
How to put an elephant inside a refrigerator?
Open the refrigerator door and put the elephant inside.
Jhagathesswary, age 11, Malaysia
What kind of dog has no tail?
A hot dog.
Fischer, age 7, USA
Why did the doofus climb the glass wall?
So he could see what was on the other side.
Terrell, age 13, USA
What is a balloon's least favorite kind of music?
Pop!
Diamond, age 9, USA
What can you break without touching it?
Someone's heart.
Noah, age 7, USA
When does 10 + 3 = 1?
On the clock.
Rami, age 10, USA
There was a green house and inside the green house was a white house. Inside the white house was a red house and inside the red house were a lot of babies. What is it?
A watermelon!
Mandy, age 19, USA
Katie, age 10, England
What walks on 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs in the afternoon, and 3 legs at night?
A person!
Laura, age 10, USA
What has a face, two hands but no arms and legs?
A clock.
Cameron, age 11, USA
