Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: School

School Jokes

Funny back to school jokes and riddles for kids, by kids!

Why were the kids laughing on their first day of school? Because they were reading Squigly's Jokes and Riddles of course! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about going and being back at school. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these BTS jokes will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. Why did the teacher go to the beach?
A. To test the water.

Q. Where do pencils come from?
A. Pennsylvania.

Q. Why was the math book unhappy?
A. Because he had too many problems!

Q. Which bet can't be won?
A. Alphabet.

Q. What do you call a square that's been in an accident?
A. A WRECKtangle.

Q. Why did Daniel go to the top of the school?
A. Because he wanted to go to high school.

Q. When is a blue school book not a blue school book?
A. When it is read!

Q. What did the cross eyed teacher say to the principal?
A. "I can't control my pupils!"

Q. What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?
A. Pick them up and roll them back to her!

Q. What did the student say to the math worksheet?
A. I'm not a therapist, solve your own problems!

Q. Why did the boy study on an airplane?
A. He wanted to get a higher education.

Q. What did the student say after the teacher said, "Order students, order?"
A. "Can I have fries and a burger?"

Q. Why did the clock go to the principal's office?
A. For tocking too much!

Q. What's the worst thing that can happen to a geography teacher?
A. Getting lost.

Q. Where do birds go to school?
A. High school.

Q. Why was the little bird punished?
A. It was caught peeping in school.

Q. What school teaches you to greet people?
A. High school.

Q. What's the best place to grow flowers in school?
A. In kindergarden.

Q. What do you need to go to high school?
A. A ladder.

Q. Why did the students study in the aeroplane?
A. Because they wanted higher grades.

Q. What do you get when you cross a teacher with a tiger?
A. I don't know but you better behave in its class!

Q. Why did the pencil cross the road first?
A. He was the LEADer!

Q. Why was the broom late for school?
A. He over swept.

Q. What do get when you cross one principal with another principal?
A. I wouldn't do it, principals don't like to be crossed!

Q. What becomes smaller when you turn it upside down?
A. The number nine.

Q. What school subject is a witch good at?
A. Spelling.

Q. What did the ghost teacher say to her class?
A. "Watch the board and I'll go through it again."

Q. What do you call a boy with a dictionary in his pocket?
A. Smartie Pants!

Q. Why did the student drown?
A. All her grades were below C-level!

Q. What do you get when you cross a teacher and a vampire?
A. Lots of blood tests!

Knock Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad we are out of school?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Justin
Justin who?
Just in time for school!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad there is no school on Saturday?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Broken pencil
Broken pencil who?
Oh, never mind it's pointless!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Canoe
Canoe who?
Canoe help me with my homework?

Jokes

Art teacher: Mimi, I told the class to draw a horse and cart, but you have only drawn a horse!
Mimi: Yes sir, the horse will draw the cart!
 

Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the...
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an I. Always put 'am' after an I.
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
 

A first grade teacher was telling her students the story of "Chicken Little." She got to the part when Chicken Little ran up to the Farmer saying, "The sky is falling. The sky is falling." Then the teacher paused and asked the kids what they thought the farmer said. One little girl raised her hand and the teacher called on her. The little girl then said, "I think the farmer said Holy cow, a talking chicken!"
 

Student: The brain is a wonderful thing.
Teacher: Why do you say that?
Student: Because it starts working the second you get up in the morning and never stops until you get asked a question in class!
 

Teacher: Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?
Nick: What do you think it is, Sir?
Teacher: I don't think, I KNOW!
Nick: I don't think I know either, Sir!
 

A teacher said to a student could you count to ten for me. This is what the kid said: "1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10."
The teacher asked, "Where is 9."
"7 ate 9," said the student matter-of-factly.
 

Teacher: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
John: You told me to do it without using tables.
 

Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
Simon: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
 

Teacher: Who is smart? Put up your hand.
Then all the students except Ken raise their hand.
Teacher: Ken, why aren't you raising your hand?
Ken: Because if I raise my hand than you'll be all alone.
 

Principal: Well, Ronald, I hear you missed the first day back to school.
Ronald: Yeah, but I didn't miss it very much.
 

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