We've got lots of funny riddles and jokes for you! We know these riddles that will be sure to make you LOL! :D
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Q. How many animals of each species did Moses take aboard the ark with him?
A. None, it was Noah's ark.
Q. What do cows like to put on their sandwiches?
Q. What do you say to Simba when he's moving too slow?
Q. Why did the cow do jumping jacks?
A. Because he wanted a milkshake!
Q. There was a boy and a doctor. The boy was the doctor's son but the doctor was not his dad. Who was the doctor?
A. His mom!
Q. What did the lucky lollipop say to the unlucky lollipop?
A. "Bye-bye, sucker!"
Q. If you have three 7 foot long ropes, how many feet do you have?
A. You have two feet!
Q. What did the crocodile say to the waiter in the cafe?
A. I want bacon, eggs, and toast and make it SNAPPY!
Q. A women shot her husband, put him under water for 5 minutes, and then hung him. Later, they went out to dinner. How did he survive, and then go out to dinner?
A. She was a photographer!
Q. What 10 letter word starts with gas?
A. An A-U-T-O-M-O-B-I-L-E.
Q. Why did the kid run to school?
A. Because he was chased by the spelling bee.
Q. Why did the baker go to jail?
A. Because he got caught beating the eggs.
Q. What did the cow say to the other cow?
A. "MOOve over!"
Q. What kind of place should you never take a dog?
A. To the Flea Market.
Q. What animal is NOT allowed to play in games or contests?
A. Cheetahs (cheaters)
Q. In a green house lives a green man and in the pink house lives a pink man. Who lives in the white house?
A. The president.
Q. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A. A dino-snore!
Q. Why did the dinosaur bring string to the baseball game?
A. He wanted to tie up the score!
Q. There was a man who walked into a bar and asked if he could have a glass of water but the bartender pointed a gun at him and the man who asked for water said thank you and left. Why did he say thank you?
A. Because the man had the hiccups.
Q. What is yours but your friends use more than you?
A. Your name!
Q. What did the glue say to the teacher?
A. "I'm stuck on you."
Q. Which country is the slipperiest?
Q. What do you call a fairy that hasn't taken a bath?
Q. I have 7 children half of them are boys, what is the other half?
A. They were all boys.
Q. What has two heads and runs faster the longer it stands?
A. An hourglass.
Q. If you have a referee in football and an umpire in cricket, what do you have in bowls?
Q. There are ten cats on a boat. One jumps off, how many are left?
A. None, they were all copy cats!
Q. What's the richest kind of air?
Q. What kind of mail does a superstar vampire get?
A. Fang mail.
Q. Which letter of the alphabet keeps us waiting?
A. Q. (queue)
Q. If you see more of it, you see less of everything else. What is it?
Q. Why did the jellybean go to school?
A. To become a smartie!
Q. What is a math teacher's favourite dessert?
Q. What is Barbie's favorite state?
Q. Why would it be silly to send a letter to Washington?
A. Because he is dead.
Q. Why did the tightrope walker visit the bank?
A. He wanted to get his balance!
Q. Which tree doesn't play checkers?
A. The Chestnut.
Q. What has holes and can still hold water?
A. A sponge!
Q. What was the name of Noah's wife?
Q. What has four wheels and flies?
A. Garbage truck!
Q. What part of a fish weighs the most?
A. Its scales.
Q. What call for help, when written in capital letters, is the same forwards, backwards and upside down?
Q. What's black and white and red all over?
A. A sunburned zebra!
Q. What letter is an exclamation?
Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!
Q. What do race car driver's eat?
A. Fast food!
Q. Where do oak trees come from?
Q. Why are fish smart?
A. Because they travel in schools.
Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.
Q. Why couldn't the girl dial 911?
A. She couldn't find the 11.