To read some more funny riddles just
Q. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?
A. Nothing, they just waved!
Q. Why did the kid put his head into the piano?
A. He wanted to play by ear.
Q. There's this guy and he's jogging. Well, he turns left, jogs some, turns left, jogs some, and turns left again. When he gets home there are 2 masked men waiting. Who are the masked men?
A. The Umpire and the Back Catcher!
Q. What do clothes and airplanes have in common?
Q. What do you call a dark colored horse that really scares you?
A. A nightMARE!
Q. What do you get if you cross some bubble bath and a famous detective?
A. Sherlock Foams.
Q. Where do New York City kids learn their multiplication tables?
A. Times Square.
Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Q. What did the calendar say to the other calendar?
A. "You want to go on a date with me?"
Q. What four letters frighten a thief?
A. O I C U!
Q. Why is arithmetic hard work?
A. All those numerals you have to carry.
Q. Which nail does a carpenter hate to hit?
A. A thumbnail.
Q. What does a tree drink?
A. Root beer!
Q. What flower gives the most kisses on Valentines Day?
Q. Why are fish smart?
A. Because they travel in schools.
Q. What is the quickest way to double your money?
A. Fold it in half!
Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!
Q. What does a wolf say on Halloween?
A. "Happy HOWLoween!"
Q. How do you know if a vampire has a sore throat?
A. You can hear him coughin'.
Q. What has a forest with no trees, lakes without water, roads with no cars and deserts with no sand?
A. A map!
Q. What do you get when you put jeans in the microwave?
A. Four hotpockets.
Q. What is coming but never arrives?
Q. What place has the most cows?
A. Moo York. (New York)
Q. What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?
A. Pick them up and roll them back to her!
Q. What is a photograph's favorite game?
Q. Why does a flamingo lift up one leg?
A. Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall down!
Q. What did the judge say when the skunk entered the court?
A. "Odor in the court!"
Q. How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep?
Q. Why did the students study in the aeroplane?
A. Because they wanted higher grades.
Q. What do you call an ant who studies accounts?
A. An accountANT.
Q. Why don't football players get hot?
A. Because of all their fans!
Q. Did you hear about the man who got his left arm cut off?
A. He's all right now.
Q. What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?
A. A synonym roll.
Q. What did the cat need when it was having trouble seeing?
A. A PURRscription!
Q. Where did the baby ghost sit?
A. In a BOOster seat!
Q. What does the sun skate on?
Q. Mary was shot in the head. She managed to avoid being hospitalized and she's as healthy as can be. How can this be?
A. She had a modeling audition. So, they took her head shots.
Q. If a very small fish married a young dog, what would their baby be called?
A. A guppy puppy.
Q. What does a cow grow on its face?
A. A MOOstache.
Q. Where did the cow go on a holiday?
A. MOO York.
Q. Why was the math book unhappy?
A. Because he had too many problems!
Q. Why did the student bring scissors to class?
A. He wanted to cut class!
Q. What do you get when you cross a ball and a cat?
A. A fur ball.
Q. What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A. "I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand."
Q. What is a volcano?
A. A mountain with heartburn!
Q. How many seconds are in a year?
A. 12: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc.
Q. Which is the loudest vowel?
A. The letter I. It is always in the midst of noise
Q. What did the tie say to the hat?
A. "You go on a head and I'll hang around here."
Q. Where do you send a soldier with a toothache?
A. To the drill sergeant!
Q. What does an injured lemon need?
A. Lemon Aid!