Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Insect

Insect Jokes

Funny insect jokes for Kids

Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about insects. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these insect jokes will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. Why did the spider take a laptop to the beach?
A. So it could surf the web.

Q. Why did the centipede go barefoot?
A. Because he couldn't afford so many shoes!

Q. What do you get when you cross a parrot and a caterpillar?
A. A walkie talkie.

Q. What do you call a musical insect?
A. A humbug.

Q. What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

Q. What kind of animals do clocks have?
A. Ticks.

Q. What did the Pink Panther say after he stepped on the ant?
A. "Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant!"

Q. How did the centipede run up a million-dollar doctor bill?
A. He sprained his ankle.

Q. What insect has great baseball skills?
A. A pop fly!

Q. How does a bee get to school?
A. On a bzz!

Q. What do you get when you eat caterpillars?
A. Butterflies in your stomach!

Q. What do you get if you throw butter?
A. A butterfly!

Q. What insect is an arithmetic insect?
A. A mosquito! They add to misery, subtract from pleasure, divide the attention and multiply quickly!

Q. Why did the bee hum?
A. It forgot the words!

Q. What do you call a bee's back?
A. It's bee-hind!

Q. Why can you never trust spiders?
A. Because they post stuff on the web.

Q. What did the bee say when he returned to the hive?
A. "Honey, I'm home!"

Q. What do you call a snail with no shell?
A. Homeless.

Q. What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A. Finding half a worm in your apple.

Q. Why are bees so sticky?
A. They use honey combs!

Q. What's the biggest type of moth?
A. A mammoth.

Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.

Q. Think of the person who lives in disguise, who deals in secrets and tells nothing but lies.
Next tell me what's always last to mend the middle of middle and end of the end.
And finally give me the sound often heard during the search for a hard to find word.
Now string them all together and answer me this:
What creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
A. A spider.

Q. What insect is a coward?
A. A flea!

Q. What kind of place should you never take a dog?
A. To the Flea Market.

Q. Why did the bee get married?
A. Because she found her honey.

Q. What do you call a fly with no wings?
A. A walk.

Q. What did the firefly say to the other firefly?
A. "You glow, girl!"

Q. What did the bee say to the naughty bee?
A. "Bee-hive yourself!"

Q. What do you call a dancing ant?
A. A dANTcer!

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Honey bee
Honey bee who?
Honey bee a sweetie and get me some chips.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Roach
Roach who?
Roach out and touch someone!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Monarch
Monarch who?
Monarch butterfly!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Termite
Termite who?
Termite's the night!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Abby
Abby who?
A bee just stung me!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Larva
Larva who?
I larva you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Bee
Bee who?
Bee happy!

Jokes

A snail purchased a new sports car. He told the salesperson that he wanted the letter "S" painted on both sides of the car. The salesman asked what is the "S" for? Snail? The Snail answered, "No, when I drive by I want people to say "Wow, look at that 'S' car go!" (escargo)
 

There was a man that studied bugs. He caught a cockroach and put it on the floor of his lab, and said "Walk," and the cockroach walked. He cut off one of the legs on the cockroach and said walk again and the cockroach walked. He went on cutting off the cockroaches legs and telling it to walk. When he cut of all six of its legs the cockroach did not walk. The man wrote in his report that when you cut off all of the legs on a cockroach it becomes deaf.
 

Patron: Waiter, what's this Praying Mantis doing in my soup?
Waiter: Saying grace.
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?"
"Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

The insects were playing against a team of flies. The flies were winning 30 to 0. At the third quarter the insects put a millepede in the game, he scored a total of 50 points. At the end of the game the coach of the flies asked the coach of the insects, "Why didn't you put the millepede in the first quarter?"
"Because it takes him forever to put his shoes on!"
 

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