Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes will make you LOL! :D





Riddles

Q. What did the skeleton say after dinner?
A. "Everything I eat goes right through me!"

Q. Where is the zombie's favorite room in the house?
A. The living room.

Q. What song do vampires hate?
A. Here Comes The Sun!

Q. What did the jack-o'-lantern say to the other jack-o'-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party?
A. "Let's get glowing."

Q. What do monsters order in fast food restaurants?
A. French FRIGHTS!

Q. What do ghosts wear on their feet?
A. BOOts.

Q. What did the little ghost say to his mom?
A. "I've got a boo boo."

Q. Why didn't Dracula have any friends?
A. He was a pain in the neck!

Q. Why did the mummy get a headache?
A. Because he was GOBLIN his candy!

Q. What do you call ghosts that ring doorbells?
A. Dead ringers.

Q. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?
A. He had no body to dance with!

Q. What do ghosts say to one another to show that they care?
A. "I love BOO!"

Q. What pants do ghosts wear?
A. BOO jeans.

Q. Why can't Dracula play baseball?
A. He lost his bat.

Q. What do you call a dead person in the closet?
A. The 1966 hide-and-go-seek champion.

Q. How do you make a skeleton laugh?
A. Tickle its funnybone!

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue?
A. To get a spare rib .

Q. What is a witch's favourite food?
A. Goulash.

Q. What monster wears the most clothes?
A. A werewolf!

Q. What do you call two witches that live together?
A. Broom mates.

Q. What do you get when you cross a mummy with a vampire bat?
A. A flying Band-Aid.

Q. What do witches call for in a hotel room?
A. Broom service.

Q. What does Frankenstein's wife wear on her face to keep it smooth?
A. MONSTERizer!

Q. What did the skeleton order with his drink?
A. A mop.

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!

Q. What do you read on Halloween?
A. BOO-ks

Q. Why did Dracula go to the library?
A. He wanted a good book to sink his teeth into!

Q. Where does a vampire keep his money?
A. In a blood bank.

Q. How do ghosts like their eggs?
A. Terror-fried.

Q. Why did the vampire give up acting?
A. Because he couldn't find a part he could sink his teeth into.

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo!
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank
Frank who?
Frankenstein!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Jokes

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!
 

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"
 

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."
 

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!
 

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
 

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

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