Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes will make you LOL! :D


Q. What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
A. "Long time no see."

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. Who won the zombie war?
A. Nobody, it was dead even.

Q. What did the little ghost say to his mom?
A. "I've got a boo boo."

Q. Why is it hard for a ghost to tell a lie?
A. Because you can see right through him.

Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.

Q. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mummy?
A. Either a flying bandage or a gift wrapped bat!

Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!

Q. What do you call two witches that live together?
A. Broom mates.

Q. What do you call ghosts that ring doorbells?
A. Dead ringers.

Q. Why didn't the skeleton want to go to the dance?
A. Because he had no body to go with.

Q. Where do ghosts get their mail?
A. At the ghost office.

Q. Why don't mummies take vacations?
A. They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

Q. Why did the vampires cancel the baseball game?
A. Because they couldn't find their bats.

Q. What did the witch say when she fell in the moat?
A. "My eels are killing me!"

Q. What do you call a dead person in the closet?
A. The 1966 hide-and-go-seek champion.

Q. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?
A. He had no body to dance with!

Q. What do skeletons say at the front door?
A. "Crick or creak!"

Q. What do you call an overweight pumpkin?
A. A plumpkin!

Q. What did the witch have for snack?
A. A sandwich.

Q. What is a mummy's favorite kind of music?
A. Rap!

Q. What games do bats like to play on Halloween?
A. Anything with a ball.

Q. How was Frankenstien's birth?
A. Shocking.

Q. What street does a vampire live on?
A. A dead end!

Q. What song do vampires hate?
A. Here Comes The Sun!

Q. What does a panda ghost eat?
A. Bam-BOO!

Q. Where do baby ghosts go when their mom goes to work?
A. A scare centre!

Q. What do ghosts wear on their feet?
A. BOOts.

Q. Why do witches fly around on broomsticks?
A. Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!

Q. What do you get when two skeletons dance in a biscuit tin?
A. Noise!

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank who?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!


A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!

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