Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes

Spooktacular Halloween jokes!

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes will make you LOL! :D





Riddles

Q. How do you make a skeleton laugh?
A. Tickle its funnybone!

Q. What song do vampires hate?
A. Here Comes The Sun!

Q. Why didn't the mummy answer the phone?
A. He was all tied up!

Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the store?
A. To get some spare ribs.

Q. What did one casket say to the other casket?
A. "Is that you coffin?" (coughing)

Q. Where did the baby ghost sit?
A. In a BOOster seat!

Q. Where do ghosts get their mail?
A. At the ghost office.

Q. Why did the Cyclops close his school?
A. Because he only had one pupil.

Q. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A. Because he had no guts.

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!

Q. What is a ghost's favorite fruit?
A. BOOberries.

Q. Who did Dracula bring to the prom?
A. His ghoul friend.

Q. What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
A. "Long time no see."

Q. What do you call a vampire 200 miles from a blood bank?
A. A cab.

Q. Where did the ghost go on vacation?
A. The BOO-hamas!

Q. What do you call a fat vampire slayer?
A. Puffy!

Q. Why do people like vampires so much?
A. Because they are FANGtastic!

Q. Where did the mother monster put her child when she was at work?
A. At day-SCARE!

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice SCREAM and BOOberries!

Q. What do you call a pig dressed as Frankenstein?
A. FrankenSWINE.

Q. What did one ghost say to the other?
A. "Do you believe in people?!"

Q. What is a hotdog's favorite phrase?
A. Happy HalloWEINIE!

Q. How was Frankenstien's birth?
A. Shocking.

Q. What kind of candy won't a ghost touch?
A. Life Savers.

Q. What is worse than being a three hundred pound witch?
A. Being her broom.

Q. Why can't Dracula play baseball?
A. He lost his bat.

Q. Did you hear about the skeleton and his girlfriend?
A. They broke up and he was shattered!

Q. Why do witches fly around on broomsticks?
A. Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo!
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank
Frank who?
Frankenstein!

Jokes

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."
 

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
 

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!
 

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!
 

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"
 

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