Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes will make you LOL! :D





Riddles

Q. How did the ghost teach her class to go through the wall?
A. She went through it over and over.

Q. What is worse than being a three hundred pound witch?
A. Being her broom.

Q. What do you read on Halloween?
A. BOO-ks

Q. Why didn't the skeleton want to go to the dance?
A. Because he had no body to go with.

Q. What monster wears the most clothes?
A. A werewolf!

Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween?
A. A Hallo-weenie!

Q. How do ghosts like their eggs?
A. Terror-fried.

Q. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?
A. The alpha-BAT.

Q. Where is the zombie's favorite room in the house?
A. The living room.

Q. Why did the vampire give up acting?
A. Because he couldn't find a part he could sink his teeth into.

Q. What did the ghosts eat for dinner?
A. Spoke!

Q. Where did the ghosts go for vacation?
A. Mali-BOO.

Q. What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
A. Any old girl he can dig up.

Q. Who won the zombie war?
A. Nobody, it was dead even.

Q. Why was the little ghost crying?
A. Because he wanted his mummy.

Q. What do you call two witches who share a broom?
A. Broom mates.

Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost and a goblin?
A. I don't know, but it doesn't sound good to me!

Q. What is a mummy's favorite kind of music?
A. Rap!

Q. Why can't Dracula play baseball?
A. He lost his bat.

Q. How do phantoms travel?
A. Ghost to ghost.

Q. What is Dracula's favorite fruit?
A. A Blood Orange.

Q. What do you call candy corn?
A. Pumpkin poop!

Q. What is the problem with two twin witches?
A. You never know which witch is which!

Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!

Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.

Q. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A. Because he had no guts.

Q. Why did the mummy get a headache?
A. Because he was GOBLIN his candy!

Q. Why did the ghost bring toilet paper to the party?
A. Because he was a party pooper.

Q. Where does a vampire keep his money?
A. In a blood bank.

Q. What do you call a fat vampire slayer?
A. Puffy!

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo!
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank
Frank who?
Frankenstein!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Jokes

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!
 

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."
 

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!
 

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"
 

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
 

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