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Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes will make you LOL! :D


Q. What do ghosts wear on their feet?
A. BOOts.

Q. What do you call a vampire 200 miles from a blood bank?
A. A cab.

Q. What key opens a Haunted House?
A. A spooKEY!

Q. How do you make a skeleton laugh?
A. Tickle its funnybone!

Q. What did the ghost put on his bagel?
A. SCREAM cheese!

Q. What do vampires sing on New Year's Eve?
A. Auld Fang Syne!

Q. What did the witch have for snack?
A. A sandwich.

Q. What does Frankenstein's wife wear on her face to keep it smooth?

Q. Why did the vampires cancel the baseball game?
A. Because they couldn't find their bats.

Q. What do you call a pig dressed as Frankenstein?
A. FrankenSWINE.

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. I scream.

Q. Where did the baby ghost sit?
A. In a BOOster seat!

Q. What kind of TV do you find inside a haunted house?
A. A wide scream TV.

Q. How did the ghost teach her class to go through the wall?
A. She went through it over and over.

Q. What is a mummy's favorite kind of music?
A. Rap!

Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost and a goblin?
A. I don't know, but it doesn't sound good to me!

Q. What do ghosts like for dessert?
A. BOOberry pie!

Q. What is a hotdog's favorite phrase?
A. Happy HalloWEINIE!

Q. Why do people like vampires so much?
A. Because they are FANGtastic!

Q. What did the jack-o'-lantern say to the other jack-o'-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party?
A. "Let's get glowing."

Q. What did the vampire bring to the baseball field?
A. His bats!

Q. What do you call a dead person in the closet?
A. The 1966 hide-and-go-seek champion.

Q. What do ghosts eat for dinner?
A. SPOOKgetti!

Q. What did the little ghost say to his mom?
A. "I've got a boo boo."

Q. Where does a vampire keep his money?
A. In a blood bank.

Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite fruit?
A. BOOberries.

Q. What school subject is a witch good at?
A. Spelling.

Q. What does a wolf say on Halloween?
A. "Happy HOWLoween!"

Q. What's a monster's favourite game?
A. Swallow the Leader!

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank who?

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!


Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"

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