Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes and Riddles

Spooktacular Halloween jokes!

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about Halloween. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these Halloween jokes and riddles will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. How do you know if a vampire has a sore throat?
A. You can hear him coughin'.

Q. What did one ghost say to the other?
A. "Do you believe in people?!"

Q. Why doesn't a witch wear a flat hat?
A. Because there's no point in it!

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice SCREAM and BOOberries!

Q. What is a ghost's favorite fruit?
A. BOOberries.

Q. What did the vampire bring to the baseball field?
A. His bats!

Q. What do you get if you cross a skeleton with a famous detective?
A. Sherlock Bones!

Q. What do skeletons say at the front door?
A. "Crick or creak!"

Q. Who does Frankenstein invite to his party?
A. Anyone he can gobble up!

Q. What did the pumpkin need for its boo boo?
A. A pumpkin patch.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite color?
A. Boo!

Q. What did the skeleton order with his drink?
A. A mop.

Q. What do you get when you cross a teacher and a vampire?
A. Lots of blood tests!

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. Why didn't Dracula have any friends?
A. He was a pain in the neck!

Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!

Q. What do vampires never order at a cafe?
A. A STAKE sandwich!

Q. What happens when a ghost haunts a theatre?
A. The actors get stage fright.

Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost, a dog and a rooster?
A. A cockatoo!

Q. What do ghosts say to one another to show that they care?
A. "I love BOO!"

Q. What did the ghost say to his wife?
A. "You look so BOOtiful."

Q. What do monsters order in fast food restaurants?
A. French FRIGHTS!

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!

Q. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?
A. The alpha-BAT.

Q. Why was the little ghost crying?
A. Because he wanted his mummy.

Q. What do you do when you see a ghost?
A. Run away of course!

Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!

Q. What time is it when you see costumes, a house, candy and hear trick-or-treat?
A. Halloween!

Q. Where did the ghost go on vacation?
A. The BOO-hamas!

Q. What is worse than being a three hundred pound witch?
A. Being her broom.

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank
Frank who?
Frankenstein!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo!
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Jokes

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
 

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!
 

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!
 

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.
 

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"
 

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