Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Halloween

Halloween Jokes and Riddles

Spooktacular Halloween jokes!

Knock-knock, Who's there? Boo who! Don't cry! Here's our collection of Halloween jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these kid's jokes about Halloween will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. What do you call a fat vampire slayer?
A. Puffy!

Q. What song do vampires hate?
A. Here Comes The Sun!

Q. Why did the skeleton go scuba diving?
A. Because he wanted to get some muscles!

Q. What is a witch's favourite food?
A. Goulash.

Q. What time is it when you see costumes, a house, candy and hear trick-or-treat?
A. Halloween!

Q. What do ghosts like for dessert?
A. BOOberry pie!

Q. Who did Dracula bring to the prom?
A. His ghoul friend.

Q. What's a vampire's favourite part of the guitar?
A. The neck.

Q. What is Dracula's favorite fruit?
A. A Blood Orange.

Q. How was Frankenstien's birth?
A. Shocking.

Q. What is the radius of a pumpkin?
A. Pi.

Q. What is worse than being a three hundred pound witch?
A. Being her broom.

Q. Where did the ghost go on vacation?
A. The BOO-hamas!

Q. What is the problem with two twin witches?
A. You never know which witch is which!

Q. What did the little ghost say to his mom?
A. "I've got a boo boo."

Q. What do you call a mummy eating in bed?
A. A crummy mummy.

Q. Why didn't Dracula have any friends?
A. He was a pain in the neck!

Q. What does Frankenstein's wife wear on her face to keep it smooth?
A. MONSTERizer!

Q. What did the vampire bring to the baseball field?
A. His bats!

Q. What song do vampires hate?
A. "You are my sunshine!"

Q. Why was Dracula put in jail?
A. He tried to rob a blood bank.

Q. What is a hotdog's favorite phrase?
A. Happy HalloWEINIE!

Q. Where did the ghosts go for vacation?
A. Mali-BOO.

Q. What room can't ghosts go in?
A. The LIVING room!

Q. Where does a vampire keep his money?
A. In a blood bank.

Q. Why did the vampires cancel the baseball game?
A. Because they couldn't find their bats.

Q. Where did the mother monster put her child when she was at work?
A. At day-SCARE!

Q. What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween?
A. Ghoul-aid!

Q. What did the ghost say when it sneezed?
A. "Ahh BOO!"

Q. What does a ghost call his mom and dad?
A. His transparents.

Knock knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ivana
Ivana who?
Ivana suck your blood.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Wolves say
Wolves say who?
Wolves say Happy HOWL-oween!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The ghost and the invisible man
The ghost and the invisible man who?
Long time no see!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo!
Boo! who?
No, no, don't cry! I was just kidding.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Frank
Frank who?
Frankenstein!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Didn't mean to scare you!

Jokes

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, "I'm going to need a beer and a mop."
 

Robert: Did you hear about the goblin that lost his left leg and his left arm?
Alan: No, is he ok?
Robert: Yes. He's all right now!
 

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.
 

Patty came up to a boy with a sheet over his head on Halloween and asked, "Are you a ghost?"
The boy replied, "No, of course not! I'm an unmade bed!"
 

A guy named Billie Bob Joe goes to a costume dress party with a girl on his back.

Harold, answering the door: What are you supposed to be?
Billie Bob Joe: A turtle.
Harold: What do you mean?
Billie Bob Joe: The girl on my back is Michelle.
 

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You're lemonade!
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

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