Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Food

Funny food jokes for Kids

Food Jokes

Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about food. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these food jokes will make you LOL! :D





Riddles

Q. A tomato, a cabbage and a hose were in a race. The tomato was red and the cabbage was a vegetable. Who won?
A. The hose was running, the cabbage was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"

Q. Why did the boy scream when he opened the fridge?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.

Q. What did the bully have for lunch?
A. He had a knuckle sandwich!

Q. What kind of fish goes great with peanut butter?
A. Jellyfish.

Q. What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
A. "You go on without me, I'll ketchup!"

Q. What do you call a train full of toffee?
A. A chew-chew train!

Q. What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A. A cookie sheet!

Q. What is Santa's favorite snack?
A. Ho, hos!

Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."

Q. What did the bread say to the man?
A. Nothing, bread can't talk.

Q. Where does the Easter bunny eat breakfast?
A. IHOP.

Q. What do bananas do when they get a sunburn?
A. They peel.

Q. What kind of doctor never works but is very popular around the world?
A. Dr. Pepper (the soda).

Q. Why are cooks cruel?
A. Because they whip cream and beat eggs!!

Q. Why did the cow eat the tight rope walker?
A. Because he wanted a balanced meal!

Q. Why did the Smartie go to school?
A. Because he wanted to be smarter.

Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!

Q. What did the skeleton say after dinner?
A. "Everything I eat goes right through me!"

Q. What does an injured lemon need?
A. Lemon Aid!

Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. I scream.

Q. What do you call a break up between a boy and a girl banana?
A. A banana split.

Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.

Q. What do cows like to put on their sandwiches?
A. MOOstard!

Q. What can you put in a freezer that's hot and will always come out hot?
A. Hot sauce.

Q. What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
A. An ice burger with chili sauce.

Q. When was meat so high?
A. When the cow jumped over the moon!

Q. Where do ghosts buy their food?
A. At the GHOSTery Store.

Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Cash
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer peanuts!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Apple
Apple who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Lemon
Lemon who?
Lemon know when you want me to say apple again.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
John
John who?
Johnny Apple Seed!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ice Cream
Ice Cream who?
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Ketchup
Ketchup who?
Ketchup and I'll tell you!

Jokes

Bob: Why don't you wanna TACO 'bout it?
Josie: 'Cause I'm NACHO friend anymore!
 

A lady came to a shop and got 14 scoops of ice cream with nuts. The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?"
The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
 

A ghost had been staying in a bed and breakfast hotel and when he came down for dinner he asked the waitress, "Please can I have two eggs, one tough and one rubbery, really tough bacon and burned, fried bread?"
The waitress said, "Sir, we really can't serve that kind of horrid food here."
The ghost replied, "Well, you did yesterday!"
 

Shelly: Our teacher is a peach.
Kelly: You mean she is really nice?
Shelly: No, she has a heart of stone.
 

Mum: Eat your roast chicken, it's got iron it!
Jack: No wonder it is tough!
 

Me: I have a pizza joke!
Friend: What is it?
Me: Never mind! It's too cheesy!
 

Once an old man and woman went to a restaurant and ordered two sandwiches. The waiter brought the sandwiches and the old man started to eat but the women was only staring at the food. The waiter noticed this and went to see what the problem was. The old woman said nothing and just stared at him but the old man interrupted and said, "The sandwich is delicious, but she can't eat because I am using her teeth."
 

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