Q. A tomato, a cabbage and a hose were in a race. The tomato was red and the cabbage was a vegetable. Who won?
A. The hose was running, the cabbage was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
Q. What did the jelly say to the peanut butter?
A. "We make a good match!"
Q. Why did the boy scream when he opened the fridge?
A. Because he saw the salad dressing.
Q. What did the bully have for lunch?
A. He had a knuckle sandwich!
Q. What kind of fish goes great with peanut butter?
Q. What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
A. "You go on without me, I'll ketchup!"
Q. What do you call a train full of toffee?
A. A chew-chew train!
Q. What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A. A cookie sheet!
Q. What is Santa's favorite snack?
A. Ho, hos!
Q. What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball?
A. "Butter up."
Q. What did the bread say to the man?
A. Nothing, bread can't talk.
Q. Where does the Easter bunny eat breakfast?
Q. What do bananas do when they get a sunburn?
A. They peel.
Q. What kind of doctor never works but is very popular around the world?
A. Dr. Pepper (the soda).
Q. Why are cooks cruel?
A. Because they whip cream and beat eggs!!
Q. Why did the cow eat the tight rope walker?
A. Because he wanted a balanced meal!
Q. Why did the Smartie go to school?
A. Because he wanted to be smarter.
Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!
Q. What did the skeleton say after dinner?
A. "Everything I eat goes right through me!"
Q. What does an injured lemon need?
A. Lemon Aid!
Q. What do you call two bananas?
A. A pair of slippers!
Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. I scream.
Q. What do you call a break up between a boy and a girl banana?
A. A banana split.
Q. What is red when you go and green when you stop?
A. A watermelon.
Q. What do cows like to put on their sandwiches?
Q. What can you put in a freezer that's hot and will always come out hot?
A. Hot sauce.
Q. What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
A. An ice burger with chili sauce.
Q. When was meat so high?
A. When the cow jumped over the moon!
Q. Where do ghosts buy their food?
A. At the GHOSTery Store.
Q. What is Dracula's favourite fruit?
A. A nectarine.
Orange you glad it's Halloween?!
No thanks, I prefer peanuts!
Lemon know when you want me to say apple again.
Johnny Apple Seed!
Orange you glad I didn't say banana!
Ice Cream who?
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!
Ketchup and I'll tell you!