Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Elephant

Elephant Jokes

What's big, grey and laughing out loud? An elephant reading Squigly's Elephant jokes. Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about elephants. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these jokes will make you LOL! :D





Riddles

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. They'd look pretty stupid with glove compartments.

Q. What did the elephant say to her son when he was naughty?
A. "Tusk tusk!"

Q. Why do elephants have wrinkles?
A. Ever tried to iron an elephant?

Q. What kind of ant is so strong that it can knock down trees?
A. An elephant.

Q. Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly?
A. Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an aspirin!

Q. What is yellow on the outside and gray on the inside?
A. An elephant that's dressed up in a banana skin.

Q. What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an elephant?
A. Great big holes all over Australia.

Q. How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A. Grapes are purple.

Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.

Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
A. Lost.

Q. What is the same size as a elephant, yet weighs nothing?
A. An elephant's shadow!

Q. What's big, grey and has red spots?
A. An elephant with chicken pox!

Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?
A. Elephino.

Q. Why did the elephant float down the river on his back?
A. So he wouldn't get his tennis shoes wet.

Q. What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A. Time to get a new fence.

Q. What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
A. Sir!

Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A. A submarine with a built-in snorkel.

Q. What do a car, tree and an elephant have in common?
A. They all have trunks!

Q. What's big and grey with horns?
A. An elephant marching band!

Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. Because they would look funny with a suitcase.

Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. The chicken couldn't be bothered!

Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.

Q. How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge?
A. There are footprints in the butter.

Q. How do you know if there are two elephants in your fridge?
A. You can hear them talking.

Q. How do you know if there are three elephants in your fridge?
A. You can't close the door.

Q. How do you know if there are four elephants in your fridge?
A. There's a red mini in your driveway.

Q. Why was the elephant afraid of the computer store?
A. Because they sold the world's best mice.

Q. How do you eat an elephant?
A. One bite at a time.

Q. What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
A. Stuck!

Q. How do you know an elephant is under your blanket?
A. Because when you get in your bed your nose touches the ceiling.

Q. Why doesn't the elephant use the computer?
A. Because it is afraid of the mouse!

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants?
A. "Look, a herd of elephants!"

Q. What do you get when an elephant sky dives?
A. A big hole.

Jokes

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Peter: Mother, why is a snail stronger than an elephant?
Mother: I don't know.
Peter: Because a snail can carry its own home, but an elephant can only carry its own trunk.
 

Policeman: One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle.
Zoo keeper: Nonsense, none of my elephants know how to ride a bicycle.
 

A guy and his elephant are driving and get pulled over. The policeman says, "You need to take the elephant to the zoo." So the guy took his elephant to the zoo.

The next day, the same policeman pulls over the same guy and elephant. The policeman says, "I told you to take the elephant to the zoo."
The guy says, "I did yesterday, today we are going to a baseball game."
 

Down in the south where coconuts grow, an elephant stepped on a mosquito's toe. The mosquito jumped up with tears in his eyes and said, "Excuse me but you're not my size."
 

An elephant asked an ant, "Please hide me." So the ant replied, "Hide behind me."
 

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