Q. Why did the elephant wear red tennis shoes?
A. To hide in the strawberry patch!
Q. What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an elephant?
A. Great big holes all over Australia.
Q. Why doesn't the elephant use the computer?
A. Because it is afraid of the mouse!
Q. How do you know an elephant is under your blanket?
A. Because when you get in your bed your nose touches the ceiling.
Q. What do a tree and an elephant have in common?
A. A trunk.
Q. How does a elephant get out of a tree?
A. He climbs on a leaf and waits till autumn!
Q. What do you call elephants that swim?
A. Swimming trunks!
Q. How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A. Grapes are purple.
Q. Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly?
A. Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an aspirin!
Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. The chicken couldn't be bothered!
Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a parrot?
A. An animal that tells you everything it remembers!
Q. What do you get when you cross a dog, a goat and an elephant?
A. A dogophant.
Q. Why couldn't the elephant move?
A. Because he couldn't lift his trunk!
Q. What is the same size as a elephant, yet weighs nothing?
A. An elephant's shadow!
Q. What do a car, tree and an elephant have in common?
A. They all have trunks!
Q. What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?
Q. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and put the elephant in and then close the door.
Q. How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and take out the elephant and put the giraffe in, then close the door.
Q. The animals were having a meeting in the jungle. Who didn't come?
A. The giraffe, it was in the refrigerator.
Q. A man was hiking in the jungle. He came to a river. In the river lived alligators. How did the man cross the river?
A. He swam across, the alligators were at the meeting.
Q. What is yellow on the outside and gray on the inside?
A. An elephant that's dressed up in a banana skin.
Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A. A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Q. What has big ears and shouts "HUT! HUT! HUT!"?
A. An elephant quarterback.
Q. How do you fit four elephants in a red mini?
A. Two in the front and two in the back.
Q. How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge?
A. There are footprints in the butter.
Q. How do you know if there are two elephants in your fridge?
A. You can hear them talking.
Q. How do you know if there are three elephants in your fridge?
A. You can't close the door.
Q. How do you know if there are four elephants in your fridge?
A. There's a red mini in your driveway.
Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.
Q. How do pachyderms hear?
A. It doesn't matter - it's ear elephant (irrelevant).
Q. Why did the elephant stay on the marshmallow?
A. Because she didn't want to fall in the hot cocoa.
Q. What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A. Time to get a new fence.
Q. Why do elephants have wrinkles?
A. Ever tried to iron an elephant?
Q. What time is it when an elephant sits in a chair?
A. Time to buy a new chair!
Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.
Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants?
A. "Look, a herd of elephants!"