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Elephant Jokes

What's big, grey and laughing out loud? An elephant reading Squigly's Elephant jokes. Here are the best elephant riddles and elephant jokes we've heard. We know these jokes and riddles will make you LOL! :D


Riddles

Q. What kind of ant is so strong that it can knock down trees?
A. An elephant.

Q. What's big, grey and has red spots?
A. An elephant with chicken pox!

Q. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and put the elephant in and then close the door.

Q. How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?
A. You open the door and take out the elephant and put the giraffe in, then close the door.

Q. The animals were having a meeting in the jungle. Who didn't come?
A. The giraffe, it was in the refrigerator.

Q. A man was hiking in the jungle. He came to a river. In the river lived alligators. How did the man cross the river?
A. He swam across, the alligators were at the meeting.

Q. What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe?
A. He called a tow truck.

Q. What do you get when you cross a dog, a goat and an elephant?
A. A dogophant.

Q. What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
A. Sir!

Q. Why did the elephant wear red tennis shoes?
A. To hide in the strawberry patch!

Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a parrot?
A. An animal that tells you everything it remembers!

Q. Why do elephants have wrinkles?
A. Ever tried to iron an elephant?

Q. Why couldn't the elephant move?
A. Because he couldn't lift his trunk!

Q. Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly?
A. Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an aspirin!

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants?
A. "Look, a herd of elephants!"

Q. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?
A. Elephino.

Q. Why do elephants have trunks?
A. They'd look pretty stupid with glove compartments.

Q. What has big ears and shouts "HUT! HUT! HUT!"?
A. An elephant quarterback.

Q. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
A. Lost.

Q. What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
A. Stuck!

Q. What is yellow on the outside and gray on the inside?
A. An elephant that's dressed up in a banana skin.

Q. What goes down but never goes up?
A. An elephant in an elevator.

Q. How does a elephant get out of a tree?
A. He climbs on a leaf and waits till autumn!

Q. Why did the elephant cross the road?
A. The chicken couldn't be bothered!

Q. Why couldn't the two elephants go swimming together?
A. Because they only had one pair of trunks!

Q. How do you eat an elephant?
A. One bite at a time.

Q. What do you call elephants that swim?
A. Swimming trunks!

Q. What's big and grey with horns?
A. An elephant marching band!

Q. How do you hunt for elephants?
A. Hide in a bush and make a noise like a peanut.

Q. What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses?
A. Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.

Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A. A submarine with a built-in snorkel.

Q. What do you call an elephant on the road?
A. A speed bump.

Q. What do a tree and an elephant have in common?
A. A trunk.

Jokes

A guy and his elephant are driving and get pulled over. The policeman says, "You need to take the elephant to the zoo." So the guy took his elephant to the zoo.

The next day, the same policeman pulls over the same guy and elephant. The policeman says, "I told you to take the elephant to the zoo."
The guy says, "I did yesterday, today we are going to a baseball game."
 

Did you know the most fattening food in the world is peanuts? Well have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
 

Peter: Mother, why is a snail stronger than an elephant?
Mother: I don't know.
Peter: Because a snail can carry its own home, but an elephant can only carry its own trunk.
 

Policeman: One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle.
Zoo keeper: Nonsense, none of my elephants know how to ride a bicycle.
 

An elephant asked an ant, "Please hide me." So the ant replied, "Hide behind me."
 

Down in the south where coconuts grow, an elephant stepped on a mosquito's toe. The mosquito jumped up with tears in his eyes and said, "Excuse me but you're not my size."
 

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