Q. What do you call a dog who wins a race?
A. A weiner.
Q. What do you get when you cross a dog, a goat and an elephant?
A. A dogophant.
Q. Why was the skeleton scared to cross the road?
A. Because there was a dog on the other side.
Q. Where do dogs go when they lose their tail?
A. To the reTAIL store.
Q. What kind of place should you never take a dog?
A. To the Flea Market.
Q. How did the dog get splinters in his tongue?
A. He ate table scraps.
Q. What do dogs have that other animal don't have?
Q. What dog loves to take a shower?
A. A shamPOODLE.
Q. What do dogs eat for breakfast?
A. POOCHed eggs and BARKen.
Q. Why shouldn't you go outside if it's raining cats and dogs?
A. Because you might step in a poodle!
Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween?
A. A Hallo-weenie!
Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost, a dog and a rooster?
A. A cockatoo!
Q. What do you get when you cross a hammock and a dog?
A. A rocker spaniel.
Q. If H20 is inside of the fire hydrant, what's on the outside?
Q. What kind of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper?
A. Any dog, skyscrapers can't jump.
Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.
Q. Why did the dog cross the road?
A. Because he was chasing the chicken.
Q. Why did the hot dog wear a sweater?
A. Because it was a chili dog!
Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch-dog.
Q. What do you get when you cross a dog and a rose?
A. A collie-flower!
Q. What's better than a talking dog?
A. A spelling bee!
Q. What do you get when you cross a bird, a car, and a dog?
A. A flying carpet.
Q. What dog can jump higher than a building?
A. Any dog because buildings can't jump.
Q. Why did the dalmation go to the eye doctor?
A. Because he kept seeing spots.
Q. If a very small fish married a young dog, what would their baby be called?
A. A guppy puppy.
Q. What kind of dog does a vampire have?
A. A bloodhound.
Q. Why did the dog stay out of the sun?
A. So he wouldn't be a hotdog.
Q. What is a dog that sneezes?
Q. Why was the dog sitting next to the fire?
A. He was a hotdog!
Q. How do you stop a dog from barking in the back seat of your car?
A. Have him sit in front with you.
How will we get away from that mean dog?
Give the pup a cookie!
Not bow who, bow wow!
Dasum cute dog!
Pooch your arms around me baby!
There were three male dogs, a Golden Retriever, a Lab, and Chihuahua, walking down the street. On their walk, they met a beautiful French Poodle. They all ran up to the poodle. The poodle says to the three dogs, "Since you all want to marry me, whoever can say liver and cheese in a complete sentence will get to marry me."
The Golden Retriever says, "I love liver and cheese."
The poodle replied, "How childish"
The Lab says, "I hate liver and cheese."
"You're hopeless," said the poodle.
The Chihuahua says, "Liver alone, cheese mine."