Q. What is a dog that sneezes?
Q. Where do dogs go when they lose their tail?
A. To the reTAIL store.
Q. What do you get when you cross a dog and a rose?
A. A collie-flower!
Q. What kind of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper?
A. Any dog, skyscrapers can't jump.
Q. What's better than a talking dog?
A. A spelling bee!
Q. Why did the dog stay out of the sun?
A. So he wouldn't be a hotdog.
Q. Why was the skeleton scared to cross the road?
A. Because there was a dog on the other side.
Q. What dog loves to take a shower?
A. A shamPOODLE.
Q. What do you get when you cross a bird, a car, and a dog?
A. A flying carpet.
Q. What money do dogs and cats have?
A. Kitty cash and doggy dollars.
Q. What do you call a dog who always knows the time?
A. A watchdog!
Q. Why are skeletons afraid of dogs?
A. Because dogs love bones!
Q. What do you get when you mix a German Shepard and a giraffe?
A. A watch dog for the fifteenth floor!
Q. Why did the dog get a pedicure?
A. Because his feet were RUFF!
Q. What dog can jump higher than a building?
A. Any dog because buildings can't jump.
Q. Where won't you find a dog shopping?
A. At the flea market!
Q. What do you get when you cross a hammock and a dog?
A. A rocker spaniel.
Q. How do you stop a dog from barking in the back seat of your car?
A. Have him sit in front with you.
Q. Sam, Lula, Mike, and Kayla all live in a house. Mike and Kayla went out to the movies and when they got back Lula was on the floor dead in a pile of broken glass and water. Sam was on the couch sleeping and didn't know what happened. How did Lula die?
A. Sam is a dog and Lula is a fish. Sam pushed over the fish bowl.
Q. What's the difference between a dog and a flea?
A. A dog can have fleas, but a flea can't have dogs.
Q. If H20 is inside of the fire hydrant, what's on the outside?
Q. Why did the dalmation go to the eye doctor?
A. Because he kept seeing spots.
Q. How did the dog get splinters in his tongue?
A. He ate table scraps.
Q. If a very small fish married a young dog, what would their baby be called?
A. A guppy puppy.
Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost, a dog and a rooster?
A. A cockatoo!
Q. Where is the best place to leave a dog when you go to a ball game?
A. In the barking lot.
Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween?
A. A Hallo-weenie!
Q. What do you get if you cross a dino and a dog?
A. A dog a sore!
Q. Why was the dog sitting next to the fire?
A. He was a hotdog!
Q. What do you get when you cross a dog, a goat and an elephant?
A. A dogophant.
Not bow who, bow wow!
Pooch your arms around me, honey!
Dasum cute dog!
Give the pup a cookie!
Pooch your arms around me baby!
There were three male dogs, a Golden Retriever, a Lab, and Chihuahua, walking down the street. On their walk, they met a beautiful French Poodle. They all ran up to the poodle. The poodle says to the three dogs, "Since you all want to marry me, whoever can say liver and cheese in a complete sentence will get to marry me."
The Golden Retriever says, "I love liver and cheese."
The poodle replied, "How childish"
The Lab says, "I hate liver and cheese."
"You're hopeless," said the poodle.
The Chihuahua says, "Liver alone, cheese mine."