Squigly Jokes and Riddles

Jokes: Doctor

Doctor Jokes

Funny doctor jokes for kids

Here's our collection of funny jokes, riddles and knock knock jokes about doctors. All these jokes have been submitted by kids visiting our playhouse. We know these doctor jokes will make you LOL! :D

Riddles

Q. Why did the rope go to the doctor?
A. It had a knot in its stomach.

Q. There was a boy and a doctor. The boy was the doctor's son but the doctor was not his dad. Who was the doctor?
A. His mom!

Q. How did the centipede run up a million-dollar doctor bill?
A. He sprained his ankle.

Q. Why did the mattress go the doctor?
A. It had spring fever.

Q. What did the doctor say to the rocket ship?
A. "Time to get your booster shot!"

Q. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A. Because he felt crummy.

Q. Why was the doctor angry?
A. He had no patience!

Q. Why was the doctor angry?
A. He lost his patients.

Q. Why did the banana go to the doctor's office?
A. Because he wasn't peeling well!

Q. Why did the dalmation go to the eye doctor?
A. Because he kept seeing spots.

Q. Why did the rope go to the psychologist?
A. Its nerves were frayed.

Q. Why did the sick shoe go to the doctor?
A. It wanted to be heeled (healed).

Q. Why did the bucket go to the doctor?
A. He had a pail face!

Knock-Knock Jokes

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Doctor
Doctor who?
You know my name!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Doctor
Doctor who?
You're right!

Jokes

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano after the operation?
Doctor: Yes, of course.
Patient: Great! I never could before!
 

Patient: Doctor, doctor. I feel invisible.
Doctor: What? What? Who said that?
 

Doctor: Next please!
Patient: Can you help me out please?
Doctor: Which way did you come in?
 

A skeleton went to the doctor. The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, "Aren't you a little late?"
 

A teenager saw twins and said to her friend, "I really need to see the doctor! I am seeing double!"
 

Patient: Doctor, Doctor, will this ointment clear up my spots?
Doctor: I never make rash promises.
 

Patient: Doctor, Doctor. I keep seeing in to the future.
Doctor: When did this start?
Patient: Next Tuesday.
 

Patient: Oh Dr. Nerdy! Everyone seems to ignore me! It's like I'm invisi-
Dr. Nerdy: Next, please!
 

A man said to his doctor, "I can't stop telling lies."
The doctor replied, "I don't believe you!"
 

Patient: Doctor, Doctor. I think I'm turning into curtains.
Doctor: Pull your self together!
 

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