Q. Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
A. Because he wanted to sleep like a log!
Q. Why didn't the wig get any presents on Christmas?
A. Because it was very knotty.
Q. What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker!
Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!
Q. What goes in a chimney red and comes out of it black?
A. Santa Claus.
Q. What does Santa say in a race?
A. "Ready, set, HO!"
Q. What is big, red and flies in the sky?
A. Santa Claus.
Q. What is a reindeer's favorite instrument?
Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A. Frosted Flakes.
Q. What's white, red and blue at Christmas time?
A. A sad candy cane!
Q. What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A. A puddle!
Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.
Q. What does Santa clean his sleigh with?
Q. Why did the elf go to school?
A. To learn his ELFabet.
Q. What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A. The Christmas alphabet has NOEL!
Q. What Christmas carol is a favourite of parents?
A. Silent Night.
Q. Why does Santa have three gardens?
A. So he can go HOE HOE HOE.
Q. What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked in the sky?
A. "Looks like rain, dear."
Q. Why are there only snowmen and not snowwomen?
A. Because only men would stand out in the snow without a coat.
Q. Why were the kids afraid of Christmas?
A. Because of Santa Claws!
Q. What do you get if you cross Santa and a dog?
A. Santa Paws!
Q. Who gives presents to baby sharks?
A. Santa Jaws.
Q. How do you know when Santa's in the room?
A. You can sense his presents.
Q. Why do Rappers like Christmas so much?
A. Because of all the wrapping!
Q. Which elf was the best singer?
A. ELFis Presley.
Q. Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?
A. They are always dropping their needles.
Q. Why was Santa's helper depressed?
A. He had low ELF-esteem.
Q. How long should a reindeer's legs be?
A. Just long enough to reach the ground!
Q. What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?
A. Krisp Cringle.
Q. What do you call a Christmas duck?
A. A Christmas quacker!
Ho, Ho, Ho
Ho, Ho, Ho who?
Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas to you!
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Irish you a Merry Christmas!
Gladis not me who got coal this Christmas!