Q. What does Santa clean his sleigh with?
Q. Why did Jimmy's grades drop after the holidays?
A. Because everything was marked down!
Q. How do you know when Santa's in the room?
A. You can sense his presents.
Q. What did the gingerbread man find on his bed?
A. A cookie sheet!
Q. What do call Santa when he stops moving?
A. Santa Pause!
Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.
Q. How did the sheep say Merry Christmas?
A. "Fleece Avoided."
Q. What comes before Christmas Eve?
A. Christmas Adam!
Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A. Frosted Flakes.
Q. Why are there only snowmen and not snowwomen?
A. Because only men would stand out in the snow without a coat.
Q. What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf?
A. Nothing, reindeer can't talk.
Q. What does a cat in the dessert have in common with Christmas?
A. Sandy claws.
Q. What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?
Q. Did you hear about the cracker's Christmas party?
A. It was a BANG!
Q. Why did Sponge Bob have a great Christmas?
A. Because he kissed Krabby Patty.
Q. What's white, red and blue at Christmas time?
A. A sad candy cane!
Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In a snowbank.
Q. Where do snowmen go to dance?
A. The snowball.
Q. What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?
A. Krisp Cringle.
Q. What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A. A cookie sheet!
Q. Why do Rappers like Christmas so much?
A. Because of all the wrapping!
Q. How do you scare a snowman?
A. You get a hairdryer!
Q. Who says "Oh, Oh, Oh!"?
A. Santa walking backwards!
Q. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
Q. Which elf was the best singer?
A. ELFis Presley.
Q. What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
A. An ice burger with chili sauce.
Q. Why does Rudolph have a red nose?
A. Because he sneezes a lot!
Q. What did the Christmas tree say to the ornament?
A. "Aren't you tired of hanging around?"
Q. Why does Santa have three gardens?
A. So he can go HOE HOE HOE.
Q. What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus?
A. Crisp Kringle.
Irish you a Merry Christmas!
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Ho, Ho, Ho
Ho, Ho, Ho who?
Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas to you!
Mary and Abbey
Mary and Abbey who?
Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!
Gladis not me who got coal this Christmas!