Q. What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker!
Q. What says, "Now you see me, now you don't, now you see me, now you don't?"
A. A snowman on a cross walk!
Q. What do they sing under the ocean during the winter?
A. Christmas Corals!
Q. What two countries should the chef use when he's making Christmas dinner?
A. Turkey and Greece.
Q. What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A. The Christmas alphabet has NOEL!
Q. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?
Q. What did the monkey sing on Christmas day?
A. Jungle bells, Jungle bells...
Q. Did you hear about the cracker's Christmas party?
A. It was a BANG!
Q. What does a cat in the dessert have in common with Christmas?
A. Sandy claws.
Q. What does Santa clean his sleigh with?
Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A. Frosted Flakes.
Q. Why did Jimmy's grades drop after the holidays?
A. Because everything was marked down!
Q. What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
A. "I'll have a boo Christmas without you."
Q. How do you scare a snowman?
A. You get a hairdryer!
Q. What comes before Christmas Eve?
A. Christmas Adam!
Q. Why was Santa's helper depressed?
A. He had low ELF-esteem.
Q. Who gives presents to baby sharks?
A. Santa Jaws.
Q. What's the best thing to give your parents for Christmas?
A. A list of everything you want!
Q. Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?
A. They are always dropping their needles.
Q. Why were the kids afraid of Christmas?
A. Because of Santa Claws!
Q. What's red and white, red and white, red and white?
A. Santa Claus rolling down the hill.
Q. What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A. A puddle!
Q. What's white and red and goes up and down and up and down?
A. Santa Claus in an elevator!
Q. What do you call a Christmas duck?
A. A Christmas quacker!
Q. What flies when it's born, lies when it's alive, and runs when it's dead?
Q. What do you get if you cross mistletoe and a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker.
Q. Why did Sponge Bob have a great Christmas?
A. Because he kissed Krabby Patty.
Q. What Christmas carol is a favourite of parents?
A. Silent Night.
Q. What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf?
A. Nothing, reindeer can't talk.
Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!
Ho, Ho, Ho
Ho, Ho, Ho who?
Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas to you!
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Mary and Abbey
Mary and Abbey who?
Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!
Irish you a Merry Christmas!