Q. Why were the kids afraid of Christmas?
A. Because of Santa Claws!
Q. What is the best Christmas present in the world?
A. A broken drum, you cant beat it!
Q. What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus?
A. Crisp Kringle.
Q. What do you get when you cross a cat with Santa Claus?
Q. Where does a snowman keep his money?
A. In a snow bank.
Q. Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
A. Because he wanted to sleep like a log!
Q. What flies when it's born, lies when it's alive, and runs when it's dead?
Q. Why was Santa's helper depressed?
A. He had low ELF-esteem.
Q. What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker!
Q. What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?
Q. What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf?
A. Nothing, reindeer can't talk.
Q. Why did Sponge Bob have a great Christmas?
A. Because he kissed Krabby Patty.
Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!
Q. What do you get if you cross Santa and a dog?
A. Santa Paws!
Q. What's red and white, red and white, red and white?
A. Santa Claus rolling down the hill.
Q. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?
Q. What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
A. "I'll have a boo Christmas without you."
Q. What does Santa say in a race?
A. "Ready, set, HO!"
Q. What do they sing under the ocean during the winter?
A. Christmas Corals!
Q. What's white and red and goes up and down and up and down?
A. Santa Claus in an elevator!
Q. What do snowmen do on Christmas?
A. Play with the snow angels.
Q. Where do snowmen go to dance?
A. The snowball.
Q. Why did the candy cane cross the road?
A. Because it wanted to get a licking!
Q. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
Q. What did the monkey sing on Christmas day?
A. Jungle bells, Jungle bells...
Q. What is green, white, and red all over?
A. A sunburnt elf.
Q. Why does Rudolph have a red nose?
A. Because he sneezes a lot!
Q. What Christmas carol is a favourite of parents?
A. Silent Night.
Q. What did the Christmas tree say to the ornament?
A. "Aren't you tired of hanging around?"
Q. What is big, red and flies in the sky?
A. Santa Claus.
Gladis not me who got coal this Christmas!
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Irish you a Merry Christmas!
Ho, Ho, Ho
Ho, Ho, Ho who?
Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas to you!
Mary and Abbey
Mary and Abbey who?
Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!