Q. What goes in a chimney red and comes out of it black?
A. Santa Claus.
Q. What do you get if you cross Santa and a dog?
A. Santa Paws!
Q. What does Santa say in a race?
A. "Ready, set, HO!"
Q. How long should a reindeer's legs be?
A. Just long enough to reach the ground!
Q. What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies?
A. Santa's burps!
Q. Why did Sponge Bob have a great Christmas?
A. Because he kissed Krabby Patty.
Q. What's Santa's favourite candy?
A. Jolly Ranchers!
Q. What do you get when you cross a cat with Santa Claus?
Q. What two countries should the chef use when he's making Christmas dinner?
A. Turkey and Greece.
Q. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?
Q. What do you get if you cross mistletoe and a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker.
Q. Why does Rudolph have a red nose?
A. Because he sneezes a lot!
Q. How do you scare a snowman?
A. You get a hairdryer!
Q. What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf?
A. Nothing, reindeer can't talk.
Q. Who says "Oh, Oh, Oh!"?
A. Santa walking backwards!
Q. How did the sheep say Merry Christmas?
A. "Fleece Avoided."
Q. What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
A. "I'll have a boo Christmas without you."
Q. Why does Santa have three gardens?
A. So he can go HOE HOE HOE.
Q. What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?
A. Krisp Cringle.
Q. What says, "Now you see me, now you don't, now you see me, now you don't?"
A. A snowman on a cross walk!
Q. What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A. The Christmas alphabet has NOEL!
Q. Why are there only snowmen and not snowwomen?
A. Because only men would stand out in the snow without a coat.
Q. What did the gingerbread man find on his bed?
A. A cookie sheet!
Q. What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?
Q. What kind of bug hates Christmas?
A. A humbug.
Q. Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?
A. They are always dropping their needles.
Q. What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A. A puddle!
Q. What Christmas carol is a favourite of parents?
A. Silent Night.
Q. What do cows say at Christmas?
A. MOOey Christmas!
Q. What do you get when you eat Christmas decorations?
Gladis not me who got coal this Christmas!
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
Ho, Ho, Ho
Ho, Ho, Ho who?
Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas to you!
Mary and Abbey
Mary and Abbey who?
Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!